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'Friendly Assassin' Cole Allen's Manifesto Shows WHCD Shooter Is a Very Intelligent Idiot

Eric V.
Eric V.  |  10:00 PM on April 26, 2026

He plotted, and he planned. He thought he had it all figured out. Right up to the point that he ended up face down on the ground in handcuffs. His plan was an abject failure, and he will likely have the next several decades (if not longer) to sit in his cell and reflect on where it all went wrong.

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Cole Allen, the radicalized leftist and self-proclaimed 'Friendly Federal Assassin,' is in custody and facing federal charges for shooting a federal officer. Allen was engaged by the Secret Service and other law enforcement when he attempted to rush into the White House Correspondents' Dinner, which was being attended by President Trump and several members of his administration. He had multiple weapons, including a shotgun, on him at the time of his arrest.

Luckily, the Secret Service agent who was hit was wearing body armor, has been released from the hospital, and is expected to be okay.

Allen is expected to face additional charges as the investigation unfolds.

The investigation moved quickly when authorities announced that Allen had written everything down in a manifesto. The Bluesky bonehead, who we're sure saw himself as the hero in his deranged story, detailed everything from the plan, his motivations, and his target list. He even emailed his intentions to family members.

Not very smart for a guy who presents himself as a super-intelligent Caltech grad.

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One would think that a guy with an engineering degree from one of the country's premier tech schools, followed by a Master's degree in computer science, would be smarter. He wasn't. At the end of the day, Cole Allen was just another run-of-the-mill idiot with more balls than brains.

You can't even call the guy a useful idiot. He successfully crossed the country and smuggled weapons into a hotel a day before POTUS and Co. would arrive for the WHCD. Only to (literally) fall flat on his face seconds after springing his ill-fated assassination attempt. Not since the Shoe Bomber has a plan for mass murder failed so spectacularly.

Maybe he saw his plan as a suicide mission, or thought he could escape, John Wilkes-Booth style, into the Virginia swamps. Whatever the case, it was obvious he wanted his manifesto found. What he surely intended to be a firsthand account of a hero's journey to rid the world of evil was, in fact, an evidence-filled idiot's autobiography of failure.

Here's a few of the highlights from the former 'Teacher of the Month.'

Hello everybody!

So I may have given a lot of people a surprise today. Let me start off by apologizing to everyone whose trust I abused.

I apologize to my parents for saying I had an interview without specifying it was for “Most Wanted.”

I apologize to my colleagues and students for saying I had a personal emergency (by the time anyone reads this, I probably most certainly DO need to go to the ER, but can hardly call that not a self-inflicted status.)

I apologize to all of the people I traveled next to, all the workers who handled my luggage, and all the other non-targeted people at the hotel who I put in danger simply by being near.

I apologize to everyone who was abused and/or murdered before this, to all those who suffered before I was able to attempt this, to all who may still suffer after, regardless of my success or failure.

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After his list of appologies the champion of all who suffer got to the motivation of his rambling.

I don’t expect forgiveness, but if I could have seen any other way to get this close, I would have taken it. Again, my sincere apologies.

On to why I did any of this:

I am a citizen of the United States of America.

What my representatives do reflects on me.

And I am no longer willing to permit a pedophile, rapist, and traitor to coat my hands with his crimes.

(Well, to be completely honest, I was no longer willing a long time ago, but this is the first real opportunity I’ve had to do something about it.)

While I’m discussing this, I’ll also go over my expected rules of engagement (probably in a terrible format, but I’m not military so too bad.)

He then goes on with a 'Kill and try not to kill' list. The 'Kill' side of the list includes all administration officials with the exception of Kash Patel.

Administration officials (not including Mr. Patel): they are targets, prioritized from highest-ranking to lowest

Secret Service: they are targets only if necessary, and to be incapacitated non-lethally if possible (aka, I hope they’re wearing body armor because center mass with shotguns messes up people who *aren’t*

Hotel Security: not targets if at all possible (aka unless they shoot at me)

Capitol Police: same as Hotel Security

National Guard: same as Hotel Security

Hotel Employees: not targets at all

Guests: not targets at all

In order to minimize casualties I will also be using buckshot rather than slugs (less penetration through walls)

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Because only the most thoughtful would be assassins use buckshot.

He follows with a point/counter point debate with himself to justify his planned action. Thanks family and friends and signs off with the self appointed 'Friendly Assassin' moniker.

Thank you all for everything.

Sincerely,

Cole “coldForce” “Friendly Federal Assassin” Allen

For anyone that may care, 'ColdForce' is his BlueSky handle.

He wasn't done though. He adds a Ps.

PS: Ok now that all the sappy stuff is done, what the hell is the Secret Service doing? Sorry, gonna rant a bit here and drop the formal tone.

Like, I expected security cameras at every bend, bugged hotel rooms, armed agents every 10 feet, metal detectors out the wazoo.

What I got (who knows, maybe they’re pranking me!) is nothing.

No damn security.

Not in transport.

Not in the hotel.

Not in the event.

This is the only part of his incessant ranbling that makes any sense. The man traveled across the country by train, check into a hotel that was expecting the arrival of the leader of the free world, and not once was he ever checked for weapons.

Security measures worked perfectly durning the event as his attack was promptly stopped in it's tracks, but he was easily able to get uncomfortably close to a sitting president with multiple weapons.

He wasn't the only one to notice the lack of security.

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The post continues:

I was not patted down and did not go through a metal detector. I probably could have shown a ticket from a prior year or a fake one as they barely looked at it. (I don't know who that exterior security was, they were guys in suits).From that point, I walked into the hotel with no further security check, and I walked down to the Fox pre-party where there were multiple ballrooms that were absolutely PACKED with attendees. Still did not go through any security at that point.Hypothetically, If I had hidden an explosive in my shoe or my jacket, I would have had no problem getting into one of those ballrooms. Only once it was time to get into the main ballroom for the dinner did we pass through magnetometers, empty our pockets, and get a pat down. And even that checkpoint was just outside of the dinner room. Two things can be true at the same time.Secret Service reacted quickly to an active armed threat and prevented that threat from getting into the ballroom. But the security leading up to that point, in my opinion, appeared to be lacking severely.

Not all of the security failures fall on the Secrect Service as Allen suggests, but there are questions that need answered.

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Allen ends the manifesto by telling the kids to stay in school and to not try this at home. He then leaves his document of dumbassery to be found in his room, and proceeds to face plant in front of the world. His brilliant plan to rid the world of a man he believed to be the next Hitler was to run really fast and hope for the best.

Cole Allen was once an intelligent kid full of potential. At some point he turned into a soft brained, BlueSky nitwit, easily manipulated by the left, academia, and the media.

Cole Allen was weak minded, and easily manilulated. He was also a willing, if not, incompetent assassin. For that he will probably spend the better part of the rest of his life in prison. Those that created him will forget him and move on to the next soft brained fool eager to write their own moronic manifesto.

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