Elizabeth Warren is emerging as the 2020 Democratic frontrunner, but illustrious supergenius Jacob Wohl’s got a plan to stop her momentum cold. Via his equally illustrious partner in crime Jack Burkman:
Tomorrow a Decorated USMC Combat Veteran is coming forward to talk about his whirlwind relationship with Elizabeth Warren
1599 • 2:30 PM EST pic.twitter.com/zKvQzNKQv6
— Jack Burkman (@Jack_Burkman) October 2, 2019
Hope “protesters” don’t show up at this presser, too! Because the conscious of the nation is at stake.
*conscience
— Eric H. (@ericinva) October 3, 2019
Words aren’t these two dudes’ strong suit. Suits are their strong suits, either:
Be sure to zip up your fly this time.
— REDDOG (@ReddogOHIO) October 3, 2019
Tall order, but you never know!
I kid you not, I thought Jacob Wohl was in jail. https://t.co/2vTObtrrCD
— Dr. Kankokage (@kankokage) October 3, 2019
He should be.
Can I skip to the part where Mr. Wohl ends up in jail?
— Mark (@Dust113010) October 2, 2019
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Update:
OK, so maybe this presser won’t be a total waste:
On this momentous day in history we will be providing complimentary @DunkinDonuts
1599 • 2:30 PM EST pic.twitter.com/fp4y870Yv8
— Jack Burkman (@Jack_Burkman) October 3, 2019
Oh, well. In that case, sign us up!
***
Update:
Let’s check in on the proceedings, shall we?
She’s finished. pic.twitter.com/CQdtcsDyJ7
— Siraj Hashmi (@SirajAHashmi) October 3, 2019
Toast.
This Jacob Wohl press conference is genuinely one of the funniest things I’ve watched recently.https://t.co/NwDiakhJCC
— Nick Waters (@N_Waters89) October 3, 2019
Even their “marine” guy can’t keep a straight face.
— Nick Waters (@N_Waters89) October 3, 2019
Journo: What unit were you in?
“Marine”: 13
Journo: 13 what?
“Marine”: you can look it up on wikipedia
— Nick Waters (@N_Waters89) October 3, 2019
My favourite bit so far is when Wohl tells the “security guard” to remove a journalist (from the sidewalk) and the guard just ignores him.
— Nick Waters (@N_Waters89) October 3, 2019
So at least this whole thing wasn’t a total loss, then.
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Update:
You guys:
The patsy in Jacob Wohl's latest sex smear says he got a scar from a sexcapade with Elizabeth Warren. His Insta shows something else. pic.twitter.com/fK5HPJT3HX
— Brandy Zadrozny (@BrandyZadrozny) October 3, 2019
This is just … *chef’s kiss*
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Looks like Jacob Wohl is ‘helping’ again by soliciting false assault claims against Pete Buttigieg