FAFO in Real Time: Man Points 'Gun' (It's His Phone) at Federal Officers,...
Now the Car Was Already MOVING? Ilhan Omar Tries Out a New Lie...
Juan Williams: 'The Record Shows the Big Bump in Premiums Is Due to...
What's a 'Hurder'? San Francisco Theater Kids Gather On the Beach for Cringe...
Porta-Potty Prince of NY: Mamdani Promises Free 'Modular Bathrooms' and What Could POSSIBL...
JK Rowling Shows Her Support for Smoking, Hot Iranian Woman Standing Up To...
Ted Lieu's Tough-Guy Letter to Oil Barons Goes HILARIOUSLY Off the Rails As...
PEAK ROFL! X MOCKS Aaron Rupar for Sobbing Over His 'Brutalized City' ......
NYT's Kristof Equates Iconic Tiananmen Tank Man to a Commie Karen in an...
Deer in the Headlights: Ilhan Omar Looks Humiliated While Radical Protester Turns on...
Crime Writer Don Winslow Posts AI Hoax of ICE Ripping Baby From Sobbing...
Escape Clause? Scott Jennings Pushes Back on CNN Dems Arguing Driver’s Intent Matters...
Ignorance Is This: Minnesota Dem Refuses to Watch Videos That Obliterate ICE Shooting...
Fraud Alert: Gov. Kathy Hochul Pledges to Expand Childcare Spending to $4.5 Billion
Here’s the Judge Who Blocked Trump From Freezing $10 Billion in Childcare Funds
Premium

Dear Canada: Keep 'Boycotting' Florida. We're Still Packed and Winning Stanley Cups

AP Photo/Wilfredo Lee

I'm a native Floridian and people who don't live here, particularly Leftists, make whole careers of hating on Florida. They so badly want to convince themselves Florida is really a bad place to live. Listen, it's fine if you don't like Florida. You don't have to make up reasons to hate. 

Very specifically, Canadians love to pretend they hate Florida. As a Floridian, they are lying. During Canadian winter, they flock here and our doctor's offices are FULL of them. They are seeking healthcare for ailments they would wait for years to address under their socialized medical system. They claim a bunch of them didn't come this year because we're bigots or something, but I'm here to testify, there are still too many of them here. Not enough of them stayed home. 

Of course, Governor DeSantis, consummate Florida Man, made sure to correct them. He clarified there are more tourists than ever (if you try to drive around here, that is fully believable) and even though it feels like the surface of the sun here most times, we beat Canada in hockey all the time. Like, we can't stop winning The Stanley Cup in Florida. If I didn't know better, I would think the trophy purposely sabotages all other teams to ensure it stays in Florida where it is warm, pleasant and people can't smoke weed in public. Also, we can run over protestors who block the roads. That's quite a nice benefit, actually. 

We absolutely don't. It's hot here. People often don't wear many clothes. No one wants to see Doug Ford with very little clothing. Let's just be honest. 

Just to be clear, it would be fantastic for the numbers to continue to dwindle.

As I was saying.

The Left hates all these things which is why they constantly disparage Florida. Let them hate. We will continue to thrive. 

Recommended

Trending on Twitchy Videos

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement