Revolting Situation: CNN Staff Upset Scott Jennings Is Referring to Illegal Aliens As...
Cycle Spectacle: Motocross Star Colby Raha Soars High in World Record Jump (WATCH)
Lemon’s Lemmings: Ana Navarro and ‘The View’ Crew Have Suddenly Soured on the...
Client Defiance Makes PETA Look Rational in ALL CAPS Rant
Another One? Nurse Says Hospitals Can’t Have MAGA Employees Treating Patients
Washington Post Journalists: Unburdened By What Has Been: Grammys Edition
Rural Areas Tasked With Finding Strategies to Make British Countryside 'Less White'
ABC News: Millions Could Lose SNAP Benefits as Work Requirements Take Effect
AWFL Thrilled to Take in Haitian Migrant — It's Like Having Your Own...
U-Haul Backed Up to the Open Door of the Quality Learing Center in...
Coached to Be Anti-ICE by Teachers, Preschoolers Hold Anti-ICE Rally at School
Woman Posts Video of Herself Kickboxing, Says It's Time to Start Training for...
Democrats Recreate Battle of Iwo Jima Flag Raising With Somali-Looking Minnesota Flag
WOMP WOMP: LAPD Says It Won’t Enforce Governor’s Mask Ban on Federal Agents
The Nation Nominates the City of Minneapolis for the 2026 Nobel Peace Prize
Premium

Dear Canada: Keep 'Boycotting' Florida. We're Still Packed and Winning Stanley Cups

AP Photo/Wilfredo Lee

I'm a native Floridian and people who don't live here, particularly Leftists, make whole careers of hating on Florida. They so badly want to convince themselves Florida is really a bad place to live. Listen, it's fine if you don't like Florida. You don't have to make up reasons to hate. 

Very specifically, Canadians love to pretend they hate Florida. As a Floridian, they are lying. During Canadian winter, they flock here and our doctor's offices are FULL of them. They are seeking healthcare for ailments they would wait for years to address under their socialized medical system. They claim a bunch of them didn't come this year because we're bigots or something, but I'm here to testify, there are still too many of them here. Not enough of them stayed home. 

Of course, Governor DeSantis, consummate Florida Man, made sure to correct them. He clarified there are more tourists than ever (if you try to drive around here, that is fully believable) and even though it feels like the surface of the sun here most times, we beat Canada in hockey all the time. Like, we can't stop winning The Stanley Cup in Florida. If I didn't know better, I would think the trophy purposely sabotages all other teams to ensure it stays in Florida where it is warm, pleasant and people can't smoke weed in public. Also, we can run over protestors who block the roads. That's quite a nice benefit, actually. 

We absolutely don't. It's hot here. People often don't wear many clothes. No one wants to see Doug Ford with very little clothing. Let's just be honest. 

Just to be clear, it would be fantastic for the numbers to continue to dwindle.

As I was saying.

The Left hates all these things which is why they constantly disparage Florida. Let them hate. We will continue to thrive. 

Recommended

Trending on Twitchy Videos

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement