Bill Clinton and James Patterson have a new novel out titled, “The President Is Missing” billed as “most authentic, terrifying novel to come along in many years.

Ho-hum.

So, who’s the mystery character killed off in the book? Scroll down for the answer:

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That’s right. Bill Clinton killed the president’s wife, who sounds an awful like a young Hillary Clinton:

How sick and demented is that?

And in the book, Hillary, er, we mean the totally fictional first lady, uses her last words to tell the president to find someone else. From the New York Times review:

“Promise me you’ll meet someone else, Jonathan. Promise me.” Let’s just call it a setup for the sequel and a dose of creative license.

One other ridiculous bit: The fake president was, wait for it, tortured while serving in Iraq and that’s why he became a politician:

Duncan is also a Special Forces war hero who was waterboarded in Iraq and could have been a baseball star if his injuries hadn’t forced him into politics.

Barf.

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