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Wall just got higher: Border fence jumper forces White House lockdown

Two things we’ve learned from Hillary Clinton’s campaign in particular are that 1) guns are bad and 2) if elected, she’s going to build not walls, but rather ladders of opportunity.


Clinton, of course, was once a full-time resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, and today her former home, guarded by heavily armed Secret Service agents, was forced into lockdown when a potential jumper made it past the first line of defense and was headed toward the famous White House fence.

Sincere question: are these really White House “bike racks,” seeing as they’re clearly marked “Restricted Area: Do Not Enter”? They look a lot like the barricades that were added after a few too many people made a goal of jumping the fence and succeeding. Security was upgraded again in 2014 when the “buffer zone” was enhanced by moving the barricades twice as far from the fence.


“Temporary” spikes were also added to the top of the main fence to make it even pointier, and if things go as planned, the next resident of the White House will enjoy — a moat, maybe?

Here’s a question for one of the lucky plants to be invited to Clinton’s next town hall: Will she pledge to disarm the Secret Service and tear down the fence? That’s not who America is.

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