In case you missed it, the Oscars have solved racism by forcing productions who want a shot at winning Best Picture to abide by “inclusion standards.”
Starting in 2024, movies will need to meet specific inclusion standards in order to be eligible for the best picture Oscar. https://t.co/aPT1qejKvU
— Los Angeles Times (@latimes) September 9, 2020
Obviously this is a fantastic policy with zero flaws whatsoever.
So, how are they gonna enforce this thing? Well, you’ll be pleased to know they’ve come up with a great idea:
“Spot checks” for Oscar eligibility means regular surprise inspections into racial origins of cast and crew — actually sounds like a great gig for former police officers https://t.co/S7wSRJRKLn pic.twitter.com/444GCHe75y
— Wesley Yang (@wesyang) September 9, 2020
What could possibly go wrong?
How is this real? https://t.co/jiNT9eF4RZ
— Andy Grewal (@AndyGrewal) September 9, 2020
It’s Hollywood, baby.
Movie sets are of course places of illusion and fantasy where makeup and other contrivances allows people to hide their true origins. We will need some kind of official authentication of origins, perhaps issued by a government office that issue certificates or insignia?
— Wesley Yang (@wesyang) September 9, 2020
But eyeballing everyone's ethnicity can be difficult, as appearances can sometimes be ambiguous. Maybe a system of badges would better facilitate all this. In the interests of enlightenment and anti-racism, of course. https://t.co/K84uhhC2gz
— Noah Rothman (@NoahCRothman) September 9, 2020
Of course.
Oy! You got a loicense for those white people? https://t.co/VrkOMrDnCX
— Noam Blum (@neontaster) September 9, 2020
Oy!
I wonder if they will employ secret agent snitches on the set? Reporting back the goings on and singling out those who do not think the right thoughts.
— Spencer #1?️ (@ThinSkinFatDude) September 9, 2020
Man, Hollywood has been spending WAY too much time hanging around with the Chinese Communist Party. Tinseltown ought to make some new friends before it picks up any more bad habits. https://t.co/11IyRVVJrX
— John Hayward (@Doc_0) September 9, 2020
Apparently, the Academy is going to require "the one drop rule" to all film actors, going forward. Not sure if they're going to require full pints of blood or not. Will dig deeper.
— Matt (@OuttaBoro) September 9, 2020
Let us know what you find out!
Hollywood's Department of Racial Purity.
— Torcular Herophilus (@TorcularH) September 9, 2020
Join the Conversation
VIP members get the ability to comment on articles.