CNN’s Brian Stelter has a story up on CNN contributor Jeffrey Toobin who is on leave from his cable-news gig after getting caught allegedly masturbating while on a Zoom call with his colleagues at the New Yorker.
But the way Stelter describes it, Toobin “has been sidelined” after an “accident”:
Jeffrey Toobin has been sidelined at a pivotal moment in the run-up to the presidential election. The reason: He exposed himself during a Zoom call with New Yorker colleagues in what he says was an accident. Here's our full story https://t.co/pHHNURlxnR
— Brian Stelter (@brianstelter) October 20, 2020
Exactly how does a guy pull down his pants and grab his junk by accident?
How many "accidents" do you have to have to knowingly take off all of your clothes (as Toobin did) and beat your meat (also as Toobin did) while on a live Zoom call with multiple people? https://t.co/2Yg2glA2FX
— Ian Miles Cheong (@stillgray) October 20, 2020
“Who among us”?
Who among us hasn't 'accidentally' whipped it out on a Zoom call and started masturbating in front of your colleagues? https://t.co/iI4SzHwLuz
— Josh Jordan (@NumbersMuncher) October 20, 2020
Stelter needs to look up “accident” in the dictionary:
An accident is when you have a soda in your hand and you spill it on your pants, not when you, well, you know. https://t.co/qc1feiBlgQ
— CEO of HydroSonics (@steveweddle) October 20, 2020
How soon until Toobin is the victim?
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Was there some evil outside force that victimized this guy into exposing himself on Zoom? At some point @brianstelter people are responsible for their own actions. https://t.co/OE2ORhsfzi
— Andrew Malcolm (@AHMalcolm) October 20, 2020
People also aren’t happy with Stelter calling him “sidelined” as if he just committed some small infraction during a sporting event:
"Has been sidelined" is White Male Journalist for "got caught." "Accident" is WMJ for "Jerked off during a work call." https://t.co/E8zGNYKltd
— Tom and Lorenzo (@tomandlorenzo) October 20, 2020
And imagine the headline if this happened to someone at Fox News?
I do wonder what the headline would be is this was… say… @TuckerCarlson I’m assuming there would be um… a difference. ? https://t.co/Z8HUIpNL3K
— Dave Ross (@drosssports) October 20, 2020
Does Toobin not understand how crazy this sound? Like, it’s OK to jerk it during a work call if your colleagues can’t see or hear it?
Toobin, a fixture on CNN, "has asked for some time off while he deals with a personal issue, which we have granted," the network said. I asked him if he had any further comment, but he referred back to what he told Vice, including that "I believed I was not visible on Zoom."
— Brian Stelter (@brianstelter) October 20, 2020
Stelter is giving this the absolute best spin imaginable:
WILL NO ONE THINK OF THE GUY WHO WHIPPED OUT HIS JUNK DURING A WORK CALL https://t.co/JDQMHamkYx
— andi zeisler (@andizeisler) October 20, 2020
And there are literally thousands of people in DC right now who can step in and fill Toobin’s shoes:
CNN has plenty of other talking heads who get off on Trump loss fantasy scenarios https://t.co/p8c9qNFavI
— Phil Kerpen (@kerpen) October 20, 2020
And we’ll note, CNN knew EXACTLY the kind of person they were hiring in Toobin and they didn’t give a s*it:
He didn't just expose himself, he was wanking off on camera. Maybe he was thinking about his colleague's daughter who he impregnated and then tried to convince to abort. Oh, and he stiffed her on child support. But please, do continue to stan for this piece of debris.
— Physics Geek (@physicsgeek) October 20, 2020
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