Banned from the teleprompter: #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay

The narcissist in chief loves to hear himself speak — preferably with a mirror or other reflective surface nearby. Even gaffe-tastic blunders are OK as long as he can hear the oh-so-dulcet tones of his own voice.

But there are plenty of phrases that aren’t likely to spill from President Obama’s yap in this lifetime. Luckily we have Twitter to catalog the #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay.

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay "It's not Bush's fault!"

— Epstein Didn't Kill Himself (@PatriotMessage) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay "I'm giving up class warfare for Lent."

— The 12th Fan (@Josh_Painter) February 26, 2013

https://twitter.com/DefendWallSt/status/306258427280252929

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay I loved "Culture of Corruption."

— Michelle Malkin (@michellemalkin) February 26, 2013

https://twitter.com/Hiraghm/status/306410350394368002

https://twitter.com/BenHowe/status/306276069470785536

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay I don't need that Teleprompter turn it off.

— Michael J. Moon (@Moondizog) February 26, 2013

https://twitter.com/mvwillbanks/status/306257494815162368

https://twitter.com/_MattGallagher/status/306403009460580352

https://twitter.com/adamlocascio/status/306415988776255488

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay The sequester was my idea and I am responsible for the consequences.

— Bob Fitz (@rjfitz66) February 26, 2013

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#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay "We have a spending problem."

— NRCC (@NRCC) February 26, 2013

@michellemalkin "Wish I could take credit for that, but I can't." #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay

— Jason Gary (@jasongary) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay My thoughts and prayers are with Chris Kyle's family, he was an American hero.

— Olivia (@livycadams) February 26, 2013

#ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay You have the right to keep as much of your hard-earned money as possible.

— Bethany Bowra (@BethanyBowra) February 26, 2013

"Let me be clear, the 2nd Amendment is not about hunting." #ThingsYouWillNeverHearObamaSay

— Cam Edwards (@CamEdwards) February 26, 2013

https://twitter.com/DefendWallSt/status/306258670877044736

Keep ’em coming, Twitter.