During his lie-fueled remarks today on the ongoing domestic oil crisis, President Joe Biden defended his administration’s decision to release additional oil from our Strategic Petroleum Reserve, thereby further depleting an already depleted supply.

Now, if you’re like us, you’re probably wondering what the logic is behind such an ostensibly awful decision. Thankfully, his trust press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre is here to explain it to us in very simple terms:

Wow. Excellent points, Karine. Or they would be if they weren’t so insanely stupid.

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For starters, she really needs to have a meeting with her boss to decide whether or not this is Putin’s fault, because right now, everything bad is Putin’s fault, and everything good (which isn’t even actually good) is Biden’s.

Aside from that, though, we’re pa-reeeetty sure that we don’t have the Strategic Petroleum Reserve because of “global market challenges.” At least last time we checked.

Wrong wrong wrong.

Perhaps we need to clear something up for Karine:

https://twitter.com/Evista122/status/1582801857260363778

No matter how much you want us to believe it is.

Please. You’re too kind.

No, really. You’re too kind. She makes Jen Psaki look like Tony Snow.

Oh, and speaking of the Strategic Petroleum Reserve, this also happened:

Well, she’s right about one thing: it was definitely not the same situation we are currently in. It was a much better situation than the situation that we are currently in. And the Democrats said no.

We feel like we’re taking crazy pills. Except we know we’re not the crazy ones.

Please (R)emedy this in November.

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