We must apologize to our readers … we know that one post about John Harwood is eyeroll-inducing enough. And yet here we are with our second Harwood post of the day.

We just can’t help it. Not when he says something as stupid as this:

“A Goldilocks report.” John Harwood certainly does seem to be living in a fairy tale.

This. Friggin’. Guy.

And being a journalist at CNN ≠ being an actual journalist.

He probably wishes you didn’t remember it, Stephen.

John Harwood is legit impressive for all the wrong reasons. It’s like he won’t rest until there’s no one left on this planet — outside of CNN, of course — who will take him seriously on anything.

Did he, though?

Kim Jong-un has secondhand embarrassment right now.

John Harwood’s embarrassment should be firsthand, though.

We wouldn’t wait if we were him.