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'IT BEGINS!!!' Reuters' 'pre-loss' spin for Beto O'Rourke is what'd happen 'if puke were a tweet' [video]; UPDATED

Despite all the money he’s managed to squeeze out of Hollywood, Beto O’Rourke’s chances against Ted Cruz aren’t looking terribly good right now. Which is why it’s more important than ever that the media help to soften the blow of his all-but-inevitable demise.

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Reuters, you’re up:

Well, that’s certainly a take.

Not a smart take … but a take, nonetheless.

Is there anyone who can lend Reuters a dictionary? They seem to be struggling with the meanings of words.

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But don’t you dare call them Fake News!

Gross. But accurate.

Accurate.

It really does.

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Worth noting:

***

Update:

Apparently the ratio got to Reuters, because they sent out a new, slightly less overtly swoon-y Beto-mania tweet:

Nice try, Reuters. But you know what you did.

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