The scare campaign that accompanies the “massive cuts” that sequestration will bring ramped up dramatically earlier this week but seemed to fizzle out quickly by the weekend. ABC News’ government agency-supplied list of 57 terrible things that will happen could have been the breaking point, seeing as ABC’s list was soon followed by the Washington Post’s story about the effects on animals at the National Zoo (they’ll be fine), followed by the Huffington Post’s photo feature of cute animals with “nothing to say” about the sequester.
With another week left before the cuts are scheduled to take effect, the White House and Congressional Democrats have only days to hype up the pain the sequester will bring. Always eager to help, the Twitterverse has compiled some additional items to add to the #SequestrationThreat list.
Malia and Sasha will have to weed the WH garden #SequestrationThreat
— Greg Pollowitz (@GPollowitz) February 23, 2013
.@barackobama has to switch to putt-putt. #SequestrationThreat
— Mike (@ThePantau) February 23, 2013
https://twitter.com/Will_Antonin/status/305381823033270274
Congress to impose a tax on blaming George W. Bush for things. #SequestrationThreat
— Dan McLaughlin (@baseballcrank) February 23, 2013
Congressmen would have to answer their own phone and listen to constituents #SequestrationThreat
— @EyeOnFreedom (@EyeOnFreedom) February 24, 2013
#SequestrationThreat 6-week sensitivity training courses on the genocidal tendencies of white people must be pared down to 3-weeks.
— Jim Jamitis (@anthropocon) February 24, 2013
#SequestrationThreat. Secret Service will have to use Whistles. #tcot #TeaParty
— John~?Kiss My Bot (@John_KissMyBot) February 24, 2013
#SequestrationThreat nostril hair on Mt. Rushmore allowed to grow to jungle proportions.
— IWantNothingHat (@Popehat) February 24, 2013
https://twitter.com/DANEgerus/status/305468533066829824
http://twitter.com/seanagnew/statuses/305386922870714368
Dogs and cats, living in sin together #SequestrationThreats
— Rick Wilson (@TheRickWilson) February 23, 2013
Number of guns Eric Holder sends to Mexican drug gangs cut by 50% #SequestrationThreat
— Drew McCoy (@_Drew_McCoy_) February 23, 2013
US forced to borrow from China. #SequestrationThreat. Wait …
— Ron Fournier (@ron_fournier) February 23, 2013
TSA X-Ray machines replaced with X-Ray Specs #SequestrationThreat
— B.J. Martino (@bjmartino) February 23, 2013
@BuzzFeedAndrew Marco Rubio will have to switch to tap water. #SequestrationThreat
— David Eichenstein (@Daverrrrr) February 23, 2013
Season 4 of The Walking Dead will have to return to the farm. #SequestrationThreat
— John Sexton (@verumserum) February 23, 2013
#SequestrationThreat Obamaphones no longer preloaded with Angry Birds
— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 23, 2013
http://twitter.com/BecketAdams/statuses/305387044799131649
Number of TSA #LadyParts petting will decline #SequestrationThreat
— Victoria (@VictoriaRColey) February 23, 2013
http://twitter.com/GOPfashionista/statuses/305390536368459777
#SequestrationThreat Mohair prices dangerously unsubsidized
— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 23, 2013
#SequestrationThreat TSA agents only fondling one testicle
— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 23, 2013
#SequestrationThreat Obama cutting back to just 6 days a week of skeet shooting.
— jon gabriel (@exjon) February 23, 2013
#SequestrationThreat drones dropping "IOU 1 Bomb" notes
— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 23, 2013
For the moment, President Obama is doing his best to maintain a brave face and carry on with life as usual.
President back at White House 7:54 ET after attending Sasha's dance recital in Maryland
— West Wing Reports (@WestWingReport) February 24, 2013
Join the conversation as a VIP Member