If you’re not familiar with Preston Mitchum‘s work, we regret to inform you that you’ve been missing out. He’s an adjunct professor with bylines at ThinkProgress and The Root, and he’s got a pretty blue checkmark, naturally. He also happens to be the self-appointed arbiter of oppression:

Them’s the rules, eh? You sure you wanna play this game, Preston?

Preston’s too busy trying to school everybody to realize that he’s one wearing the dunce cap.

So, we can’t help but wonder: who gave Preston his license to determine what oppression looks like? As @neontaster points out, Preston doesn’t seem to want to follow his own rules:

Oooooof.

Speaking of numbers, @neontaster’s definitely got Preston’s.