Welp, CNBC contributor James Pethokoukis just deadpan-summed it all up, didn’t he?

https://twitter.com/dqydj_net/status/395002013232021505

Twitter users upped the funny with more Newspeak.

https://twitter.com/DestroBadass/status/395002486828072960

Heh.

Business Insider’s Josh Barro tried some absurd spin about the doubleplusungood product Monday night.

What?!

Snort.

And Twitter user Virginia Hume tied it all together.

Perfect.