Get to your Trapper Keeper and make him a sammich! Why the FACT in front?
https://twitter.com/bdogdesign/status/258458553646460928
And with that, Ace of Spades took on President Obama’s always absurd FACT deal. You see, his account incessantly tweets with the word FACT in front of the statement. Because that totally makes it true and stuff! What had Ace going this time? The ludicrous “binders” narrative, which, of course President Obama has lamely latched onto today.
Good lord. The smallness. RT @charliespiering Obama: We don't have to collect a bunch of binders to find talented women right now
— RBe (@RBPundit) October 17, 2012
Because, vagina!
And so it began, with hot new Twitter avatar, to boot.
Once again, President Obama and his fellow, sexist travelers are reducing women to the sum of their girly bits. Or, lady parts as he prefers; silly dames are even supposed to “vote like their lady parts depend on it.”
Ace lays it all out with his own FACTS.
FACT: Down with tampons, up with binders.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
Yes, we mustn’t forget the ludicrous Tampon-gate.
FACT: Mitt Romney hates women, because he keeps them, physically, in binders.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
FACT: Women's lives are impacted far more by the Lily Ledbetter Act than by persistent 17% real unemployment.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
FACT: Women like chocolates and flowers. The Lily Ledbetter Act is just the legislative form of chocolates and flowers.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
FACT: We've gone from saying women are more than a V'ger to saying women are just a walking V'ger, with boobs.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
Recommended
Lady. Parts.
FACT: Sisters are not, in fact, doing it for themselves. They need the steady hand of Daddy Rainmaker to goose them.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
Bingo! Helpless and hapless Julias, all.
FACT: Mitt Romney prowls the highways in a black Ford 428 Cobra Jet, looking for runaways to put his binders.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
FACT: Obama pays women in the White House 21% less than men only because he wants them to pursue their dreams in fashion or homemaking.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
FACT: Since Obama became president, millions of women have left the grind of the male-dominated workforce to pursue dream careers on Etsy.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
FACT: Under Obama, more women than men have lost their jobs, and that leaves them open to pursue their true calling, Husband Hunting.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
@philipaklein The ad should show me, Mitt Romney, appealing to women with facts and chloroform and then putting them into Sex Binders.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
I would like to announce the new Romney/Ryan campaign song, celebrating Sex Binders http://t.co/PaI2jMJ6
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
FACT: Mitt Romney's appeal to women is based on misrepresentations and chloroform.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
I vow I will outlaw tampons, and compel bindings.
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
Don’t stop, please! Others weigh in.
https://twitter.com/Blackburnsghost/status/258622745401769984
RT @dreaavellan will tampons B free? | In my plan, you can build a tampon factory, but it will go bankrupt due to my Cap & Applicator scheme
— Ursus, Director of Weather and Banana Programming (@AceofSpadesHQ) October 17, 2012
More please, Twitter! Our “lady parts” include our funny bones and you have them tickled pink (a nice girly color, natch)!
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