We, at Twitchy, love us some Jarvis. His latest musing has us pulling out our tinfoil hats and adjusting the rabbit ears on our televisions.
I’m about 7 beers deep and I’ve decided that the NYC Abolish Housing lady, the new woke mayor of Seattle, and the schizo Trump Grand Jury lady are all the same CIA agent. pic.twitter.com/cf8F0IEwg3
— Jarvis (@jarvis_best) January 7, 2026
Has anyone seen all three of them in a room together? That's the only way to disprove his theory. Now, Leftist women are generally ugly. It's all that hate seeping out of their pores. Blame their rejection of the patriarchy. But these three are all the same shade of ugly.
The New Seattle Mayor lives @ home with her parents ! https://t.co/vAXdBMAkXQ
— BasilnSage Trading (@BasilnSageTrade) January 7, 2026
Who else would want to live with her?
Perhaps more people should be 7 beers deep and on Twitter, because this is eerily accurate. Or is it just that Jarvis is a genius? https://t.co/Ak11SdeCiq
— John Podhoretz (@jpodhoretz) January 7, 2026
Maybe both?
You're not wrong that they look alike! May an evil clone! https://t.co/5jifbhXeiT pic.twitter.com/dRQ6D4C1KD
— Anita Evans (@AnitaEvans2911) January 7, 2026
One might even say 'psychotic' clone.
All white liberal women are crisis actors if you think about it. https://t.co/IjBAdiAAVU
— •Nic• (@AsTheWorldBurnz) January 7, 2026
Well, they're all butt-ugly girls hell-bent on getting revenge on the popular crowd for shunning them in high school, that's for sure. https://t.co/tarUCGhl2l
— Fyrewede ☦️🌈 (@fyrewede) January 7, 2026
I drank 0 beers and came to the same conclusion yesterday 😂 https://t.co/NlQDIuJ3Ls
— Deanne Faulk Knighton (@FaulkDeannek) January 7, 2026
Even the sober understand this take.
He has a point https://t.co/TjAs3rUXyD
— Al Tournas 🇺🇸🇮🇱⚓️🏌️♂️⛷ (@altournas) January 7, 2026
Why don’t they have eyebrows
— Kimberly Ross (@SouthernKeeks) January 7, 2026
The lab that created them forgot that step.
It’s almost not even worth thinking about
— Jarvis (@jarvis_best) January 7, 2026
I cannot now unsee this pic.twitter.com/OEoBC4vtc4
— ZitoSalena (@ZitoSalena) January 7, 2026
They definitely used the same cloning seed
— Jon 🔬 (@JonnyMicro) January 7, 2026
— The🐰FOO (@PolitiBunny) January 7, 2026
Oh wow yeah you're right def
— Sour Patch Lyds ن (@sourpatchlyds) January 7, 2026
Definitely doesn’t work for the FBI.
— Burt Macklin (@BurtMaclin_FBI) January 7, 2026
They aren't even trying anymore.
They all fell out of the same ugly tree.
— Grumpy Tech Bro (@GrumpyTechBro) January 7, 2026
Facial structure looks ok, just have no true friends.
We must eliminate this phenotype
— Forest Mommy🌲🗡💪🏹🌲🌲 (@ForestMommy) January 7, 2026
If not, they're definitely from the same gene pool. This explains a lot! 🤣🤣🤣
— MOMof DataRepublican (@data_republican) January 7, 2026
Oh, it's eye-opening.
There’s a certain genre of woman.
— Dr. Jebra Faushay (@JebraFaushay) January 7, 2026
7 beers deep Jarvis is an asset @NSAGov
— snacklemore (@intotheweids) January 7, 2026
Here's the thing.
— Brady Dale (@BradyDale) January 7, 2026
They aren't.
and yet...
Yes, they are.
That's what so unsettling.
It's all very disturbing.