Reach for the stars, California Obamacare marketplace. Hey you guys, just go telephonic!

And does it really take “less than an hour” to enroll in a Covered California insurance plan? Shorter citizens: You lie!

Well, there’s always the website, right?

Good luck with that. It should work out well as long as you’re prepared to have your eye doctor come at you with some lube and a speculum.

KTLK reports:

The California Medical Association said it found mistakes such as obstetricians labeled as ophthalmologists and the wrong doctors described as fluent in Russian and Farsi, the Los Angeles Times reported.

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Jef Kurfess of Westlake Village has been shopping for health plans on Covered California for his two adult sons and possibly for his wife. He says he hit snags while searching for local doctors and a nearby hospital.

“Getting an incredibly inexpensive plan with no doctors you want to see will be a rude shock for people,” Kurfess told the Times.

But hey, if the online exchange and call center don’t work out for you, there’s always snail mail. Or fax.