It was announced this week that Steven Spielberg and Harrison Ford will get back together for a fifth installment of the “Indiana Jones” series.

If Spielberg is looking for winning suggestions that’ll break box office records, he should be comforted to know that Salon is there to help:

We expected nothing less.

In Salon’s version, do people who meet Indy have to take shelter in a safe space to escape some microaggressions?

Not in Salon’s world!