Here’s a story so gross, we thought for sure we’d read it and been disgusted by it before. Sure enough, this piece from Women’s Health Magazine dates back to 2015, but the editors seem to have resurrected it just in time for Thanksgiving 2017.

“Steal her recipe for an unforgettable Thanksgiving feast,” says Women’s Health. Remember that when your progressive relatives pass around the bread basket on the 23rd.

OK, seriously, you might want to skip this excerpt — and again, no, this isn’t The Onion.

Caitlin Abber reports:

But does such a recipe even exist? Yes, it does, thanks to feminist blogger Zoe Stavri, who, after getting a pretty bad yeast infection, had the inspired idea to turn her discomfort into delicious baked goods.

“Waking up on Saturday with the familiar itchy burny fanny, I giggled to myself, ‘Maybe I could make bread with that,'” Zoe writes on her blog, Another Angry Woman. “And that ticked into, ‘Well, I’ve always wanted to try making my own sourdough anyway,’ and then a ‘Fuck, would that even work?’ And then I got curious, and the next thing that happened was I was scraping white goop off of a dildo into a bowl of flour mixed with water.”

Hero.

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