The Doomsday Clock, maintained by the Science and Security Board of the Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists, sure is a tease. It’s tough to get too worked up about impending planetary annihilation when you realize a group of scientists can move the hands at will, like they’re holding over that one-day-only sale on mattresses.

A lot of Americans associate the Doomsday Clock with the 1980s and the height of the Cold War, but the thing’s still ticking, and the timekeepers are set to make an announcement about the minute hand this Thursday, assuming we’re not all dead by then.

Maybe they’re going to announce they’ve finally upgraded to a digital readout? Maybe that’s why they haven’t been invited by the president to bring their cool clock to the White House.

The minute stood at a cozy 5 minutes to midnight when the previous president took office but only 3 when he left. Wasn’t the Iran Deal supposed to wind that thing back a few hours? Thanks, Obama.

Sure, they’re a bunch of super-scientists trying to save the world, but their branding could use an update for the 21st Century.