A special place in hell for those who don’t find Vermin Supreme funny? He’s probably much more amusing if you limit your exposure to a few minutes every four years, when a flat $1,000 fee is all it takes to be added to the New Hampshire ballot. At least 15-year-old Iowa prankster Deez Nuts knew enough to give up on the joke back in August, but Vermin Supreme has been annoying presidential candidates for decades.

This year, Vermin Supreme has a four-point platform:

  1. Mandatory tooth brushing laws
  2. Time travel research
  3. Zombie preparedness
  4. Free ponies for all Americans

Supreme tracked down Sen. Ted Cruz and was able to get close enough to demand that terrorists be waterboarded with fluoridated water. (Mild language warning.)

That’s … unfortunate. Look at the joy he’s brought to Chris Christie’s security detail with his goofy antics.

Camouflaged among Trump and Fiorina campaign signs were representatives of Time Traveling Mothers Against Vermin Supreme.


Don’t forget to check out Townhall.com’s live New Hampshire Primary results tonight!