The president is currently thousands of miles away, but the White House was placed on lockdown today after an apple core (or is it spelled corpse?) was thrown over the fence, NBC News reports.

Twitchy cannot confirm that Vice President Joe Biden fired two shotgun blasts out the front door to frighten away the intruding fruit, which managed to get past the expanded buffer zone created by the small barricades and the temporary (and super spiky) “removable anti-climb feature” added this summer.

The Secret Service also cleared a portion of Pennsylvania Avenue and took in the woman who threw the apple for questioning.

Must be one of those bitter clingers.

That has to be racist somehow if we think about it long enough.

Fuji. As in ref-fuji.