That’s not such a crazy theory, really. Why else would The New Republic publish a piece on “the carbon costs of greeting cards” just two days before Valentine’s Day?

That, too, is possible. But we think most men will go ahead and spring for that 18.5 grams of CO2.

Sorry, composite girlfriend “Julia,” no card for you this year. When you care enough not to send a card, how about a subscription to The New Republic instead?