This is why Catholics can’t have nice things. A while back, magician, libertarian and atheist Penn Jillette had offered what he calls Chiquita Banana Wednesday as an atheist alternative to Ash Wednesday, signified by the wearing of a sticker on the forehead in place of ashes. The “tradition” has since moved to Twitter and inspired the hashtag #ChiquitaBananaWednesday.

Um, how much planning did you need?

It’s an unorthodox tradition in more ways than one; neither Penn nor his followers could seem to track down actual Chiquita stickers.

We’re happy for you, but count us in with #TeamPatriciaHeaton on this one.

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