American Bridge 21st Century, “a progressive research and communications organization committed to holding Republicans accountable for their words and actions,” has released its 200-page opposition research book promising to tell voters everything they need to know about the next wave of potential GOP presidential candidates.

Yes, there are words buried in those 200 pages, but several reporters are having a good time today checking out the core of the opposition research, which seems to consist mainly of digging up old yearbook photos with hairstyles that are certain to derail any number of campaigns.

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“Martinez 2016: Still Cool AF” would make a great bumper sticker.

Editor’s note: This post has been updated to correct a typo.