No, seriously. It’s an actual headline at First Read at NBC News: “Ryan did wash dirty dishes during soup kitchen visit.”

This is news, to the lapdogs on Team Obama. As Twitchy reported, lapdogs in the media have been breathlessly reporting on Paul Ryan’s Dish-Gate scandal.

You know, because there is no real news going on in the world or anything. Today, they finally get to the bottom of it. Days late, natch.

The opening paragraph:

LYNCHBURG, VA — Amid questions and criticisms related to Paul Ryan’s visit this weekend to an Ohio soup kitchen, the charity’s president said the Republican vice presidential candidate did, in fact, scrub dirty dishes though his visit wasn’t officially sanctioned.

Amid questions by whom? You, lapdogs. Only you. Note, it’s still super nefarious and all. Where was his official sanction? WHERE?

All the details, tweeted Mike O’Brien! You mean the ones that were clearly evident from the photos? Also, you are worthless idjits. Just want to give you a little heads up there; we are givers and all. So are these Twitter users.

We know, truth is hard. But, seriously, lapdogs: Seek help.