No, we didn’t call Peace and Freedom presidential candidate Roseanne Barr fat and lazy — we wouldn’t dare, particularly after lazy was added to the ever-expanding Handbook of Racial Code Words. Those are the candidate’s own words, though she calls herself a fat, white, lazy doer in service of her country.

We’ll leave it to expert Bill Maher to determine if Barr is too white to be president, but we all might be thinner soon if Barr’s prediction of food shortages comes to pass.

Hmm… is that why the first lady published a book about gardening?

Barr also reveals that her campaign spot begins running tonight. Yes, the campaign is real, and here’s the proof.