Bette Midler wanted the “pathetic bunch of losers” in Washington to hurry up and pass more laws. But now that our legislators are close to sending President Obama a lard-laden Sandy relief bill to sign, suddenly she has reservations.

Bette can take comfort in knowing that Homeland Security is “only” set to pull in $3 million for “audits and investigations,” not $3 billion. Zeros are hard. But there’s plenty more where that came from.

Too bad the House had to pass the bill before Bette cared what was in it.