Viewers watching Ted Cruz deliver his GOP victory speech on CNN and MSNBC suddenly found themselves watching Hillary Clinton deliver her own “victory” speech — even though a winner had not been officially declared yet, as the vote was too close to call. How close? How about as close a two-tenths of a percentage point, with votes still being counted?

Meanwhile …

  • TomJB

    Well it *is* past her bed time. So what difference at this point… doessss…. iiiit.. zzzzzZzzzzzzzz……

  • Emily B

    The best part about that speech was StickerBoy. Why is there not an entire thread dedicated to him?!! 😀

    • Chris Carter

      And Sticker Boy doesn’t even support her. He just came to the rally and took free Hillary stuff.

      • bil_g

        Hillary was giving away free acid?!

    • Adam Wood

      Sickerboi loaded to the hilt on X was absolutely the highlight of the night.

      Too bad no one there handed him a glow-stick while Hillary was screeching. That would be footage that the History Channel would show for DECADES as the moment that Hillary’s campaign really went TRULY pear-shaped.

  • syvyn11

    In one line she said “we must all be united”. Next “We must stop republicans!” She doesn’t give a flying fig about the rank and file of the GOP.

    • nc ✓s & balances

      I didn’t listen to the speech. Was there any mention of stopping ISIS or Islamic terrorism?

      • oldshortfatboy

        NO, she didn’t say a thing about barky.

    • EnoughIsEnough

      She also said the Republicans would “divide us”. I think that ship has sailed, courtesy of the Administration she belonged to.

  • Chris Carter

    So much hilarity from people I despise tonight. This is better than opening presents on Christmas morning when I was a kid.

  • ArmchairMike

    Sticker boy stole the show, if the window licking cankle monster stays out of jail and somehow lies her way to a win she has to name that little idiot the secretary of stupid shit.

    • Michelle ✓classified


    • Ryan Schneider.

      I heard half the FBI will go on strike if this is swept under the rug. She put THEIR people’s lives at stake with her cavalier treatment of the Super Secret Twenty Two, or SS22. She had better watch out. If James Bond learned some elitist prig in parliament had put him and his colleagues in danger through some stupid convenience, and then had the audacity to run for Prime Minister, Bond would likely see to it he had an “accident”.

  • vetgal1970

    As hard as she’s been trying all these years, Bernie tying her is a loss. She knows it and Bill knows it

    • Chris Carter

      I saw on Twitter her poll numbers from this summer being well over 50% down to 0% tonight and it was amazing. This is a big loss.

      • vetgal1970

        She polls as negative as trump does. I’ve always told my daughter to beware of someone who has tried THAT hard for that long just to be in power. She should lose, she deserves to lose

  • Mary Mommy Happy 2017!

    Yes Hillary. We do need to be united with keeping your corrupted lying deceitful manipulation shrew self from being president and sending your unethical criminal self to a maximum secure prison.

  • Dwayne Mountain Dew Camacho

    Wait…I need someone to explain something to me….

    Realclearpolitics…has Clinton at 683 …and Sanders at 680.

    Are you telling me the ENTIRE democratic primary in Iowa…has about 1500 voters?

    So if I went to Iowa…got 1500 republicans to switch over to democrats….and vote in that primary we could literally take over the Iowa democratic winner?

    We could have picked O’malley…or just wrote in a random name…and WON?

    That cant be how it works….right?!?!?

    • topbond101

      No it isn’t. I was wondering the exact same thing as you. I think it kind of works like the electoral college, representing votes by smaller numbers, but I don’t know exactly how it’s numbered that way.

      • Dwayne Mountain Dew Camacho

        Are you sure? because they also have a section for “delegates”….

        I read the wikipedia entry…and apparently they all stand in different circles or something. Its weird.

        • David

          It is common for democrats to stand in circles doing what democrats do. There’s a name for it, but in the interest of decency I’ll leave it up to you to decide.

    • bil_g

      Decision Desk HQ is showing 9,901 votes in the Dem primary, so, yeah, I don’t get where they’re getting these numbers.

      Still, they’re showing 186,289 in the Rep primary. Either way, that’s a butt-whoopin’.

      • Dwayne Mountain Dew Camacho

        at least that makes somewhat more sense though…10K voters…still seams like we could have convinced all of Ben Carson voters…to switch parties and vote for him as the democratic front runner.

        That would be an awesome headline….”Cruz and Carson win Republican and Democrat Iowa primaries”


        • bil_g

          HA!!!! Yeah, that would’ve been awesome.

    • Adam Wood

      Those numbers are delegates, not actual voters.

      In each of the 1581 (I think) precincts, there is one delegate, and whomever carries the caucus in that particular precinct gets that delegate.

      Republicans deal with actual voter numbers, and then there are proportional delegate assignments. Democrats have an all-or-nothing delegate count. That’s why there’s seemingly a huge difference in the numbers between Democrats and Republicans.

      • kcinmo

        Just checked, there are 1681 precincts.

    • TugboatPhil

      I thought you’d remember how it works in Iowa, Mr President. If the vote count is too close, the candidates go into Rehabilitation.

  • HiltonHead_Dude

    Good God, the woman is really not likable, and every time she opens her mouth, it shows.

    • MoxieLouise1

      I swear, when she was screeching out that speech, the neighborhood alley cats came up on our deck and started slapping each other around. What a voice!

  • Snowblind

    That was code to put her operatives into action to steal the caucus.

  • lCOYAR

    Just for that, I hope Slanders wins for the Dims here just to humiliate Shillary

  • wrestlefan01

    2-34 in watch sticker cheeks guy lmao

    • wrestlefan01
      • jaded

        I hope this is replayed often! Hillaryous! 🙂

        • wrestlefan01


      • Michelle ✓classified

        I am dying laughing over here! This kid needs to be made Interwebz famous.

        • CatHerder ✓fire! ✓fire!

          Pretty sure he’ll be with us at least as long as Pajama Boy.

      • Oxco

        Hillarious…. Posted on Twitter, plz retreat this #StickerBoy2016

    • Hi This Is My Username

      He looks like he needs a hobby. Lmao.

      And holy hell, Hillary has quite the set of crazy eyes.

  • LinTaylor ✓vitrified

    I guess Huma emailed her the wrong speech.

    • journogal

      Clinton does get confused at times.

  • ToyZebra

    If Hillary can’t stand out against Bernie, maybe the democrats will let her get indicted and desperately try to throw Biden in.

  • bobbyt1964

    Once again, we have proof that Socialism is – as Churchill said – “…the equal sharing of misery.” The Leftists “redistributed” the vote, and EVERYONE is a loser.

  • bobbyt1964

    I can’t WAIT until November to get my Hillary Clinton Commemorative Plates (for my new Jeep!)

    • Michael the white suburbanite

      you mean the ones she made in prison

  • Darkbella007

    That woman should be in jail.

  • Darkbella007

    Why is she free? What about our men!

  • HiltonHead_Dude

    Its clear that Chelsea got her personality from her “mothers” side.

  • Deplorable Spinster

    Still say brokered Dem convention with Biden stepping in.

  • JosephBloughs ✓Viagrafied

    Victory speech now, because grandma needs her meds and has to be in bed by 9.

  • Lenny Ghoul✓VʳᵒᵒᵒᵐVʳᵒᵒᵒᵐ

    6 tied precincts were apparently won by a coin toss. Clinton picked heads won them all. You can’t make this shit up.

    • Roto ✓Intentionally Left Blank

      Which….. Clinton picked “heads”??? 🙂

  • Jim Collins

    The pantload in the pants suit is in trouble.

  • wharfrat

    Clinton didn’t win, she’s a loser,the DNC is in shambles,they have a Communist and an old hag running for office,Bernie looks like he slept in his car,and his followers are all young know nothing 20 somethings, if they would look at history they would run away from the old Communist,he is going to destroy America more than Obama has already done,so far.

  • Roto ✓Intentionally Left Blank

    Well, Hillary also thought she won Libya, Yemen, Benghazi, and the ISIL controlled territories from Damascus to Baghdad… so there’s that.

    • Michael the white suburbanite

      chalk this up as one more accomplishment

  • David

    Who knows what the final tally will be when they find the lost precinct votes? Why is that so often when elections involve democrats that there are so many lost ballot boxes and loose chads (now it’s malfunctioning computer glitches)?

  • Doc Farmer✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ ᵈᵉᵖˡᵒʳᵃᵇˡᵉ

    So, with no clear winner, she declares victory.

    Quantum Chutzpah on Parade…

    • Hashtag pundit

      She felt the need to Hillsplain the results to us.

  • kennyraisin

    Whatever happened to Pajama Boy in the onesie American flag jammies from a couple of rallies ago. Did he get a selfie with the Hildabeest?

  • Ryan Schneider.

    I remember the first picture I saw of Bill and Hillary, from when I was in the fourth grade. It was just a few days after they won Iowa in ’91. I thought something looked fake about them then, too. I was too innocent to know it was everything.

  • Jerry Shelton

    She can call it a win all she wants. But less than 1 percent, should scare the dung beetles out of everyone on her campaign. She might not be the “chosen one’ after all.

    • John Howard

      Chosen, for Leavenworth.

    • EnoughIsEnough

      Less than one percent, and she needed 6 coin tosses in her favor to get there. Hardly a ringing endorsement.

  • Arttie the Deplorable

    Pyrrhic victory?

    • CatHerder ✓fire! ✓fire!

      More like Khadesh. Stop the battle, declare victory and everybody goes home.

  • John Howard

    Less than 1 percent over a devout Socialist? Not a win. A loss.

  • Sanchez Crazy as a Loon

    This will end up in court count on it.
    Sanders already was paranoid about Microsoft and with the numbers this close his paranoia will demand a recount in court.

    • EnoughIsEnough

      I would want the quarters from all the coin tosses confiscated!

      • Arttie the Deplorable

        They were supposed to use a penny. Larger coins represent the 1%ers and represent illegal monies.

    • Arttie the Deplorable

      Did the coin actually flip while in the air? Bern could hang his hat on that.

      • ToyZebra

        Now Hillary’s followers understand why she sent them all two-headed coins.

  • Sanchez Crazy as a Loon

    A trunk load of vote ballots will be found in a Clinton campaign workers car.

    • EnoughIsEnough

      Closets are more the Clinton’s style eg: Whitewater papers in WH closet, server in bathroom closet.

  • journogal

    This is her time, dammit! She isn’t going to let anything, such as vote counting, get in her way.

  • Hotlanta Mike
    • tbmbuzz

      And all of these equate to TOTALITARIAN.

      • Hotlanta Mike

        That’s what a leftist’s true nature is all about. If you disagree the leftist shouts obscenities at you and casts ad hominem attacks at you.

  • Hotlanta Mike
    • John

      Try some penicillin.

      • Hotlanta Mike

        It may be a superbug…no cure available.

  • Hotlanta Mike
  • Hotlanta Mike
  • Hotlanta Mike
  • Hotlanta Mike
    • journogal

      And are the same idiots that complain about old white rich career politicians.

      • Hotlanta Mike

        Diversity for thee, not for me…

  • Michael the white suburbanite

    Noticed a lot of white men in the photos behind Hillary, that’s a different trend

  • Rogue Cheddar

    Fetid Old Tomb va-jay-jay hubris run amok.

  • globalcrap

    Just another lie from a lying socialist Benghazi democrat hoping she gets to prison soon.

  • Terry West

    Where’s the BLM crowd?

  • freeinaz

    What difference is there between Bernie & Hillary?

  • usaeagle1776

    Well, the HILDEBEAST calls a victory eh? LOL Pathetic.

  • marcus tullius cicero

    …As expected….
    BTW, old Bill looks like he’s a “dead man walking”…

  • American

    What this proves is that 50% of Democrats don’t care about National Security and, the other 50% of Democrats are anti-capitalists.

    More simply put….Democrats are 100% un-American.