The OMB pulled the plug on the United States government a few minutes before midnight, plunging the nation into what’s being called #Shutnado. The effects were immediate in many cases, with websites like the USDA disappearing at midnight. But how were civilians affected? Without the benefit of Michelle Obama’s #DrinkH2O tweets, poor Dana Loesch developed a drinking problem.

It’s worse than we all imagined.

  • Cy

    I think I just saw a star go out.

    It’s spreading.

    • trixiewoobeans

      Gravity’s next everybody! Tether yourselves!

      • mapache

        The space station is spinning out of control and the polar bears are dying.

        • falcon7204


          (Especially you, you low information voters, you.)

    • Glenda Malone-Wolfe

      That was funny as hell!!

    • rssllue

      Best laugh in days. Thanks, Cy! We need to laugh in these trying times of doom and desolation. You saved me from despair!

  • nc ✓s & balances

    Shutnado: Will you all be here when (if?) I wake up tomorrow morning?

  • Tugger – ✓unᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

    OK, lets get all of the politicians into their underground cold war bunker (for their safety, of course) then change the video feed going in to a loop of The Walking Dead and just leave them there.

  • TroyGates

    Isn't the first episode of @WalkingDead_AMC started with a government shutdown? #AimForTheHead #shutnado— TroyGates (@TroyGates) October 1, 2013

  • Archaic

    I think the politicians are more freaked out about #Shutnado than the ordinary citizens.

    The politicians are all “THE APOCALYPSE IS UPON US” and the citizens are all “Meh”

    • vetgal1970

      That’s because the politicians know WE are about to find out how they have been using shady everything to make promises, borrow money, and pay bills.

    • mapache

      State governments are functioning just fine. If the Federal government seriously affects our daily lives than maybe the Federal government is getting involved too much.

      • Igor

        Stop making sense. Shut up down, please…

      • hutch1200

        Stop signs/speed limits & Red lights are now optional!

  • kawaie

    well I still have my rum in my hand and the NSA van outside disappeared.. good night to be alive

  • descolada9

    Oh, no, Disqus is going down! Wait, that happens every day…

    • $9844146

      Hey, just like UpChuck Todd on Obama.

  • Jack Deth

    My cats are howling outside on the porch, but there’s plenty of dry cat food!

    What am I to do???!!!!

  • kawaie

    I hear the sharks getting eaten by sea turtles and the seagulls being quiet..oh God this is the end..

  • 0bamasnought

    Wake me when it’s over, I have slept through most of the last 17 ShutNados.

    • Bruce

      You mean there’ve been others?

      • stellatruman

        That can’t possibly be true 😉

      • 0bamasnought

        Sit down my children, and let me tell a tale.
        Back when I was young and dinosaurs roamed the Earth….

  • The Man With No Name As A Name

    Who at the NSA will be able to scan my emails?

    • Zach Smith

      You will have to spy on yourself for a while.

      • DiamondbackRuss

        The NS has never been affected by a government shutdown

      • Worship Dancer

        AND be expected to report every vile thing you did during #Shutnado

  • Anthony Clay

    How will Pelosi buy her 800 dollar scarves, oh the humanity, what about her botux injections if her face falls its the end

    • Worship Dancer

      i think she’s actually been getting buttocks injections in her face. her hearing is failing you know.

  • Jack Deth

    To paraphrase Rorschach:

    “The liberals and Low Information Voters will reach up to the heavens and scream, “Rescue Me!”

    And I shall whisper “No!”

  • johnmully

    *BREAKING* Hoover Dam reporting systems failure, large robot seen fleeing the scene #Megatron #ShutNado

    LMFAO!!! Best tweet ever

    BLUE TURNS RED IN 2014!!!

  • Bruce

    Look on the bright side; the golf courses will remain open for our Shanker-in-Chief. The less he spends in the Oval Office, the less damage he can do (like Dana, however, I’m still having a hard time drinking water without assistance. The up-side? My Uncle Weeb is coming over to assist me tomorrow…the down-side? He has a bladder like a little girl)

  • Ian Michaels

    Government shutdown has restricted access to huge federal stockpile of golf balls. What is our shanker-in-chief going to do? Oh the humanity!

  • VerminMcCann

    Good news: Beer still works.

    • $9844146

      Beer hmmmm.

    • Dan Defoe

      Will single malt scotch still work? I must give it a try this afternoon. I’m sure it will be a dicey proposition without government support. I usually rely on John Boehner for all my liquor advice.

      • VerminMcCann

        You’d better give it a try and report back–assuming the internet is still working.

      • Igor

        May God have mercy on your soul if you depend on Choo-choo Biden for all your firearms advice!

        • Dan Defoe

          Yep. Step outside and fire two shots in the air to ensure that shotgun is empty for maximum protection. That’s the ticket.

          Obammy loves me! This I know,
          For the Government tells me so;
          All of us to Him belong,
          We are weak but He is strong.
          Yes, Obammy loves me! Yes, Obammy loves me!

      • hutch1200

        My blended turned to single, non alcohol, malt Scotch. Damn you all to hell #Shutnado!
        BTW, Stop Signs are now optional!

    • 0bamasnought

      Sweet avatar, I still have a chunk of one in my arm.

      • VerminMcCann

        Fortunately, that one was returned to the Gunny after an uneventful op.

  • justinc3220

    My Glock still works for home security during the shatdown. (Retard Rep said it not me)

  • Zach Smith

    I checked the street in front of my house. It’s still working. I just flushed the toilet. It still works. I’m not sure that the effluence went to the government, but it went somewhere.

  • Perplexed

    I am amused

  • Michael Rice

    Is global warming shutdown now?

  • Doc Farmer ✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

    Oh, Crap! Thank You, SyFy. Because of you, we now have a new hash tag on Twitter to cover the unfunded government – #shutnado

  • Maxx

    As long as MSNBC’s nanny state nuthuggers continue to puke their putrid prose, #shutnado has failed us.

  • Dean Scholl

    if a government shut down is going to be so devastating to our everyday lives….does that mean that we have too much government in our lives…

  • Jay Stevens

    Looks to be a reprise of Y2K when … nothing much happened.

  • Richard J Sunkle

    Oh my gosh Oh my gosh Oh my gosh Oh my gosh The sun hasn’t come up yet and I haven’t got bread and milk.

    • Jill

      Bread and Milk? Without the USDA website and their healthy eating charts, can you be so sure such items are safe for human consumption? Better to eat printed out petitions from or propaganda….er, I mean…printed information from Organizing for Action’s website.

    • JR48

      You forgot eggs.

      Bread, milk and eggs = french toast. The bare minimum needed for a government disaster…or a two inch snowstorm.

  • mapache

    NPR is in crisis mode. Due to Shutnado they have dimmed the lights in the studio. Now all the hosts are dim. ….is that news?

  • kblue905

    My husband, the soldier, was excited to go to work today. There won’t be 30 civilian contractors (earning twice what he makes) sitting around and slowing down the work that he and his 11 soldiers need to get done. Yes, the contractors outnumber the soldiers 3:1!

  • Thomas, Snarkmaster General

    #Shutnado … and I still haven’t gotten over Sequester-Palooza yet!

  • paulinpittsburgh

    My favorite has to be the CNN reporting an AR-15 used to shutdown the government … priceless. They’re all pretty great though.

    We shouldn’t be joking though it’s getting bad out here already. I just went to call off work because the roads I use to get there no longer function as a result of the shutdown and realized that without the services provided by the Federal Line Taxes collected off my bill, they’re not going to working either.

  • Trudy Hill

    so in the future when this happens again does that mean will all have to do without healthcare when gov shuts down?

  • Adam Johnson

    somebody actually stayed there until midnight to shut down the panda cam? Probably got overtime for working Monday, then no pay on Tuesday. This is just Twilight Zone level silliness.

  • BoscoBolt

    I saw a dead crow during my morning jog … this is only the beginning …

    • moovova

      Friend…think “survival”…

      You’re having steak for dinner.

  • Trudy Hill

    wow Obama pretty good at holding red line threats with the GOP !

  • Doug Rink

    Looks like the sun came up on time this morning. Or am I just hallucinating?

  • MikeDH

    Our dysfunctional government is now a non-functional government? Wait…is that an improvement?

  • moovova

    My wife is finally seeing the wisdom of my “prepping” for disaster. Unfortunately, we’re already half way thru the freeze-dried brie cheese, and now I’m forced to start rationing the Cheerios to my kids (one for you, one for you).

    AND, no matter what the anti-gunners tell you…a PopTart chewed into the shape of an AR-15 (complete with red-dot scope, forward grip, bayonet & Harris bi-pod) DOES NOT work against the attacking Shutnado Zombies. We had to resort to the real thing. Still, be glad when government garbage service returns so we can get rid of the piles of the dead undead out in our yard.

    Pray for us. Will continue to post as long as my tax-payer funded Obama phone last.

  • Clete Torres ✓ᵈⁱˢᵍʳᵒⁿⁱᶠⁱᵉᵈ

    I have to do laundry today, will my washer still fill with water during #shutnado?

  • falcon7204

    At least there’s still coffee …

    … for now.

  • DanG

    This is the day the oceans began to rise again.

    • Andrea Pfeiffer-Sanchez

      bwaa ha ha ha I’m really enjoying all the comments a grin has been on my face for the last few minutes, OMG, I just looked outside and the Midwest is all fogged in, no wait it’s disappearing…….help…… me……………

  • PennyRobinsonFanClub

    And Skynet has awoken . . . Judgement Day is upon us . . .

    • keyboard jockey

      It’s okay the same H 1b visas holders from India that were hired to set up the software for ACA (cheaper than American labor) are the same one’s who programmed Skynet.

      • PennyRobinsonFanClub


  • Karin_A

    Those were hilarious, but especially GUAM HAS TIPPED OVER. GUAM HAS TIPPED OVER. HAHAHAHA! Love you SooperMexican.

  • bluewaternavy

    Overheard at PS 205 here in NY: “Mommy, does the government running away mean I don’t have to eat that bad lunch?”

  • Marvin Nelson

    Maybe California will finally slide into the ocean without the support of the Dimocrats from that great state.

  • John

    I was LATE to work this morning and I burnt my lip on my coffee. GOD HELP US ALL

  • Dan Defoe

    How will I navigate the food desert? I could wander for 40 days and 40 nights.

  • Hexhamgeezer

    Chinese are burning $s now instead of coal as the shutnado renders the currency obsolete.

  • Hexhamgeezer

    Olde England’s BBC report that dead polar bears are blocking the entrance to the Hudson River.

    Can this be true….?

  • moovova

    Tried to sign up for Obamacare online today but was re-directed to the NSA .gov website.

    Some government lackey did a pop-up on my monitor telling me I would be unable to apply until I paid a $1.37 fine I’ve owed the public library since 1997.

  • MarkReardon

    I’d obsess about #shutnado, but I died in agony along with my whole family during#sequesternami

  • Hexhamgeezer

    O’BBC update.

    Death Terror Hatestorm of Clerkicide caused (apparently) by a big Tea Party.

    America! TPs should only last about 90 minutes. Put down that cake and finish your tea and get back to saving the oceans (and that)

  • binks webelf

    Air may be rationed, so get every available container, balloon, garbage-bag, and airtight thingamabob to fill with air ASAP– it could mean your family’s lives! Dear God– next the sun will go out…. why.. why did we not bend the knee unto Glorious Leader?!

  • Stephanie Warren

    Megatron would have made a better president.