Any farmer knows that pulling weeds is just another part of a mostly thankless job, so can you blame Occupy Oakland for losing its patience when conservatives started popping up everywhere in its Twitter timeline? Who, though, could resist pointing out the irony of the people of #OccupyTheFarm asking for donations of fresh greens? Twitter stalwart Sooper Mexican and friends certainly couldn’t.

The Huffington Post has all you need to know about Occupy the Farm, but in short, the University of California is looking to sell the site of its former International Center for Biological Control to a private developer. Occupy, though, began a “campaign of direct action farming and guerilla food distribution” last year to preserve Gill Tract as an urban farm. HuffPo reports that occupiers “cleared the farm’s weeds by hand and planted over two acres of vegetables,” but photos from today’s occupation don’t really show it.

There’s the shelter, but where’s the food? The first crop was reportedly twinklefingers.

Laugh all you like, conservatives (Sooper Mexican’s coverage will help facilitate that), but know that your ridicule stems from fear — fear that capitalism is eating itself. Now bring those salads and some hot food.

Look, some food grew!

  • Vicki Fry

    I wonder if she’ll keep her “never talk to the cops” mandate if one of her fellow Occupiers rapes her.

    • Chevypowered

      Remember what happened when this occupy crap initially started? So the answer to your question is, yes she would.

    • trixiewoobeans

      Wowee wow wow! That Alyssa is one BAD mamma jamma!

  • http://twitter.com/die_mich_zwei Spatial Awareness

    You can’t knock the stupid off these morons with a Hellfire Missile.

    • Jeremy

      You can’t fix stupid I have always said that.

    • CR

      Could we try? Please? I’ll pay for whatever it costs!

      • http://twitter.com/die_mich_zwei Spatial Awareness

        At $70,000 a piece… it’s doable. The problem is getting your hand on one of those nifty drones… Oh wait! Lets just call Iran. >:^]

  • OpenTheDoor

    Hilarious, that photo Alyssa posted is lettuce.
    You nit wits are growing lettuce? What are your row crops?
    You are growing the most non-nutritional food ever and call yourselves subsistence farmers. Beans, peas, soybeans, peanuts, corn, potatoes, kale, collards, peppers, not lettuce, head palm.
    What a bunch of dopes, starve, we will watch.

    • NRPax

      I freely admit that my knowledge of agriculture is pretty limited. But I think the answer to your question is that the other foods you listed are too labor intensive for Occutards to grow effectively.

      • http://twitter.com/thetugboatphil TugboatPhil

        Or to simplify even a bit more, those other crops require labor.

        • NRPax

          I guess they expected a full crop just for showing up.

      • Garth Haycock

        It’s obvious that growing lettuce is beyond their ability as well. I doubt they could even grow tomatoes.

        • Chrissy the Hyphenated

          Do we have any evidence they GREW this little plant anyway? It’s so small, I think it could easily have been bought in a little starter pot at Agway or something and replanted here for its 15 minutes of Occupy Fame.

          • http://twitter.com/thetugboatphil TugboatPhil

            Good point. It was either donated or stolen. No one in that crowd would have “bought” it.

          • Netmilsmom

            Or perhaps they got a bag of lettuce at Safeway and stuck some of it in the ground for a picture.

      • brewerandpatriot

        Marijuana is fairly labor intensive as well, or so I heard back in my college days…

        • NRPax

          Let me guess: The statute of limitations on where you got your knowledge has not run out quite yet? -:-)

    • thetreyman

      i think someone brought that with them and planted it that day. the dirt is too loose around it.

      • Frank Drebin

        They bought a bunch of plants and begged, borrowed or stole a roto-tiller – ‘cuz real farming takes too damn long and they want to be farmers RIGHT NOW!


        • trixiewoobeans

          Occupy THIS, lettuce!!

        • Chrissy the Hyphenated

          Ha, so I was right. ::snort::

        • Gallatin

          They used a “global warming” producing machine????!!!

    • http://twitter.com/MDMorris_1707 Michael Morris

      Lettuce: Cabbage that’s had all of the flavor and nutriment bred out of it.

    • John (it true me am)

      Hell, peppers don’t even take effort. These morons make me feel good about my own gardening

  • froggy19510

    You are living on a farm. Pick something and eat it!
    Stupid, selfish, lazy, dirty, arogant, punk, worthless,theiving, pigface pigs.

  • CR

    So we are occupying things again? Oh goody, that was so productive the last time and so much got accomplished!

    How about OCCUPY A D*MN JOB!

    • trixiewoobeans

      I’d like it if they occupied their brains.

      • Garth Haycock

        Before they can occupy their brains, they need to have brains to occupy.

        • trixiewoobeans

          Well, they can walk, talk, and (hopefully) wipe their rears…where there’s life, there’s hope!

          • Chrissy the Hyphenated

            Do you have actual evidence of said accomplishments?

          • trixiewoobeans

            No, and I have NO intention of checking on the last one!

    • thetreyman

      these idiots never stopped. i think they are the last ones left.

    • TexSizzle

      If they’re too lazy for that, they should go home and occupy their parents’ basements.

  • CR

    Good holy lord these people are so so stupid it just physically hurts.

    We want more government!!!
    We LOVE government.
    We HATE the police.
    Wait, the police are PART of the government.
    OK, well not THAT kind of government. The good happy kind of government.
    Wait, the government is who we are protesting against here?
    Umm… Pass the banjo!

    Also, I would wager $100 bucks that the person who tweeted that capitalism was eating itself did so on an iPhone.

    • VoxAZ

      You win, the pic says it was “Taken with Camera+ for iPhone and iPad” LOL

  • Clayton Grant

    Everyone, I would like to be the first to welcome you to Obamamerica. Expensive Green Jobs and cheap Green Cards, but few green vegetables. Enjoy your stay.

  • DV S1EOG

    Well if they are seeking donations, then the solution seems simple, don’t give them any food. Either they will get off their asses and get it themselves or starve to death. It is a win win situation, although the latter would be much better.

    • gekkobear

      Well then they’ll just sell whatever they produce to have their own stuff…

      What do they produce again?

      Oh, ok… Anyone in the market for some trite slogans?

      Some of them rhyme if that helps…

  • http://extremesplash.wordpress.com/ Ben Bollman

    The anti-GMO movement at its finest.

  • Frank Drebin

    ‘Occupy the Farm and bring us salad’ isn’t too far removed from ‘Occupy the Back Yard in a Pup Tent’, and Mom will bring us microwave popcorn at eight o’clock.

  • Leeta Sweet

    Oh My, I’m very flattered to have made Twitchy! Was a shock, but I got over that real quick. It’s been a great day reading SooperMexican’s tweets and watching his videos.

    • Rabid

      The podcasts are even better!

  • ToyZebra

    Look like a bunch of bums in a vacant lot.

    • http://twitter.com/die_mich_zwei Spatial Awareness

      It is.

      • NRPax

        I think last year’s Occupy the Farm attempt marks one of the few times I’ve felt bad for Berkeley students. The people working that land that the Occutards took over are using it as a lab for their schoolwork. Hopefully nothing was destroyed by them.

    • LadaMokusa

      Looks like a bunch of vacant bums in a lot.

    • LadaMokusa

      Looks like a bunch of vacant bums in a lot.

  • CatHerder

    Ugh. To @storm the bastille: do you really want to see storm trooper tactics? Really? I promise you, you will survive them only with broken bones. Seriously. Have you ever had a bone broken? I have, it hurts like a bastard. Ribs kicked in? Had three broken, had to have my wife pin my shoulders to a wall so I could cough.

    Shuddup, already.

  • trixiewoobeans

    You don’t just “occupy” a farm, you WORK it! I know, I know, you thought it was easy peasy…stick a seed in the ground and kick back…let Gaia do the work, and Presto, there’s dinner, just like at Mom’s!

    • chetnapier

      hey they will put fertilizer on a squad car

      • trixiewoobeans

        Were they trying to grow more? Lol!

      • John Thomas “Jack” Ward III

        All they have to do is open their mouths, and….PRESTO! COMPOST SOIL, AND FERTILIZER! #RightWard Jawamax 8<{D}

  • http://discus.com yourmamatoo


  • J.N. Ashby

    Yeah…I’m pretty sure the guy in the straw fedora ain’t a farmer. Farming is probably too mainstream for him. Hell, I grow herbs on my patio, and I’m probably more “farmer” than he is.

  • john mason

    Want to really be useful? OK, Occupy the main IRS headquarters and stage a live feed telethon. I triple-dog-dare you!

  • LinTaylor

    “guerilla food distribution”? The eff does that even mean? They run up and shove tofu and carob in peoples’ pockets?

    Then again, expecting intelligence and forethought out of Occupy is like expecting a turkey to write Shakespeare.

    • trixiewoobeans

      PLEASE!! No tofu in my pockets! Lordy, you can’t make this stuff up! Other countries are laughing their asses off at us…and I’m laughing with them!

    • trixiewoobeans

      “Guerilla food distribution”. Maybe you have to run up in the hills and chase them behind trees…”GIMME MY LETTUCE!”

    • El Guapo

      In my neighborhood “guerilla food distribution” is when you have so much zucchini that you leave it on porches and in unlocked cars.

      • trixiewoobeans

        Can I have an AMEN!

        • John Thomas “Jack” Ward III

          AMEN, TRIXIE! #RightWard Jawamax 8<{D}

      • Frank Drebin

        August 8 – Sneak Some Zucchini Onto Your Neighbor’s Porch Day


      • JR48

        When I was a kid, that applied to zucchini and tomatoes. Lock your doors in August in September.

      • mike_in_kosovo

        I remember the year that Mom planted a full 40 foot row of our truck garden in zucchini… your description came pretty close. Us kids were going from house to house on the rural route giving it away!

  • trixiewoobeans

    Their parents must be so proud!!

    • John Thomas “Jack” Ward III

      Question, Trixie: WHY CAN’T THEIR PARENTS/FAMILIES “FEED” THEM? Just askin’… #RightWard Jawamax 8<{D}

  • Mr. Saturn

    My grandpa worked his ass off on a rather sizable garden he had in his retirement years. My dad works his off tending to one of his own. These people probably think sitting around doing nothing will get the job done.

    • NRPax

      Well so far, it’s brought them fame from the politicians and sympathy from the press.

  • trixiewoobeans

    Still laughing.

  • chetnapier

    Dandelion greens are tasty and nutritious but you have to pick them yourself.

  • AMERICAN Kafir™(KAdams)

    Is that all they have growing? That one sprout of lettuce? Here’s my roof.. yes, my ROOF from last year:

    • nc


  • Rosie

    Sigh. I apologize for all the idiots my state has produced and my generation in general. I swear, we’re not all that bad!

  • camnpat

    And this is the people that Nancy Pelosi keeps using as an example of the people that Obamacare will “help”. Those with other passions beyond work such as music, arts, and …. creating shelters without the basic understanding of survival skills to get it to protect from the sun, much less from the rain.

    I am so happy I’ll be paying for these idiot’s health care… / sarc

  • Roto

    #OccupyTheFarm <== Idiots out standing in their field

    • MyrmidoNOT

      Curious: “How deep do you ‘plant’ them?? 😉

  • Gallatin

    “but capitalism is eating itself”

    I would say that since you are asking for donations of food that you are the one “eating” capitalism. I’ll be right over with some Monsanto GMOs to help the cause.

  • Gallatin

    “but capitalism is eating itself”

    Two kinds of people say this kind of crap:

    1. People who have done very well under Capitalism (mikey moore and 99% of hollyweird) however, they believe most other successful Capitalists have stolen their success and they “owe” fruits of their labor to “Occupy” type people.
    2. People who haven’t done very well and think Capitalism has stolen from them so they are “owed” the fruits of everyone else’s labor.

  • bo1921

    I love the “farm clothes” they’re wearing.

  • http://twitter.com/BrianPHovland Brian H (wackobird)

    What in the world is “twinklefingers”? I have scoured the interwebs…..to no avail. Granted, I am sure it is lame, but just what is it?

    • AMSilver

      It’s a new age voting technique, since raising hands is an invention of the capitalist oppressors and thumbs up/down is a barbaric remnant of the Roman Empire commonly used these days by classless rubes and rednecks. To show favor for an idea, the enlightened occupier holds s/his hands palm outward, with his fingers pointed upwards, and wiggles his fingers. To show disapproval, the occupier would turn s/his fingers downward and wiggle them.
      Next up: reinventing the wheel.

  • Susan Anthony

    Great crops there, straight from a real farm’s greenhouse.


    How blessedly funny and patently ironic to be part of a movement to “occupy the farm” and then ask for food! You cannot make this stuff up!

    These people need to occupy their lives for a change.

  • AMSilver

    Overheard at #OccupytheFarm: “But, dude, where’s the produce?” “I don’t know, we planted the seeds, it should be here…” “Have you been giving it enough Brawndo?” “I was supposed to give the Brawndo to the plants?” “Dude! It’s what plants crave!”

  • John Thomas “Jack” Ward III

    1)Thank GOD for Cali’s Anti-Gun laws, or the property owner would’ve shot you hippies by now.
    2)REPEATED THEME!:Food grows with HARD WORK, not some Commie Liberal “PeaceFest!”
    And, why exactly do you have to STEAL PROPERTY (Land) and “OCCUPY” (Read:TRESPASS ON PRIVATE PROPERTY) when you can buy it? #OccupyThis! #NoBrainerAlert! #RightWard Jawamax 8<{D}
    Only TWO ACRES?!? LMFAO!

  • justlittlolme

    Oh noes! ‘Capitalism is eating itself’ according to #occupythefarm! They must be jealous because their *enemy* has something to eat and they don’t……and from the looks of it, they never will!
    Don’t worry you ‘commune’-istic fools….Darwin WILL get around to taking you out. LOL!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Justin-Mars/1021563074 Justin Mars

    Zombies do exist. They are called Obama voters and occupiers.

  • capisce

    I’d bet the only thing sustainable OccupytheFarm is aiming for is a collective high.

  • JR48

    I come from that neck of the words and what you’re describing is exactly what is happening. They seriously believe that they’re doing something. What they don’t get is that they’re doing literally nothing.

    A real farm is the definition of work. What you see here is actually sitting, playing music, milling around and typing on some sort of technology while they wear organic cotton clothing and cool stuff from REI. Oh, and begging for food. What farmer has to beg for food? Farmers eat well, sell their crops and give it away. What they don’t have time for is sitting.

    And if you understood what you can grow year ’round in that temperate climate, you’d be laughing even harder. Even people with black thumbs can grow food there. In a container or a postage stamp yard, it’s doable as long as you water during the summer. Oh wait…that involves commitment and work. Never mind.

    • trixiewoobeans

      Perhaps they’re “farming” for “good vibrations.” Lol! This is STILL cracking me up!

    • Stephen Speck

      They’re farming. They have a whole load of plants under blacklight back home in their basement…

  • ozconservative

    They need donations of food and Brawndo coz Brawndo has what plants crave.

  • CombatDiver

    That smirking cop looked uber intimidated by the gaggle of hippies and their makeshift drum circle or it may have been the stench of patchouli oil and lack of deodorant.

  • MarcusFenix

    When someone breaks into her house and steals her stuff, she’d talk to a cop then…too bad cops have to talk to idiots.

  • MarcusFenix

    When someone breaks into her house and steals her stuff, she’d talk to a cop then…too bad cops have to talk to idiots.