Sorry if the headline ruined the suspense, but no, Ashley Judd will not be running for Senate in 2014. We were looking forward to seeing just what Judd meant when she said that she could handle a campaign against Sen. Mitch McConnell, what with having been raped twice. We certainly wouldn’t rule out a run in the future, though; her announcement does indeed sound like it was written by someone who was born to campaign.

Admit it: you’re disappointed too.

The Twitterverse is already hard at work recasting the role of McConnell’s opponent.

It might have been a short flirtation, but we’ll always have Louisville.

Update:

Ashley Judd offers her thoughts on the decision, meaning she rambles on without saying much of anything. (Hey, we never said she wouldn’t fit in in Washington, D.C.)

  • Lexikin

    Yea. More like she’s mentally incapable of holding office. Tootles Hollywood!

    http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Hollywood/2013/03/27/judd-raped-twice-can-handle-mcconnell

  • Love of Country

    What a Drama Queen ….. I mean this is great news but is it really even news? She just stopped something she never even started and then she had an epiphany about it …. unbelievable!

    http://theatre.pppst.com/banner_drama_elements.gif
    http://www.dramaplayconnection.com/actor.gif
    http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-pUAoaJ4SlWw/TyVmcbEM19I/AAAAAAAAACI/j5CKredJXws/s1600/Drama.gif

  • kate_middleton

    I am bummed! Her candidacy would have been pure gold – for Republicans, for comedy. You know Mitch has got to be disappointed too.

    • $24698634

      She teased it long enough for Mitch to make a fool of himself; but I repeat myself.

      • kate_middleton

        Oh give me a break. I don’t think Mitch ever acknowledged her. If you’re talking about that ad, American Crossroads did that and supposedly Mitch’s people were upset they did that so soon.

        If Ashley had run, there definitely would have been one fool in that race. And it wouldn’t be Mitch.

      • http://www.facebook.com/corey.dennison Corey Dennison

        That’s quite a fantasy world you live in, sweet-cheeks.

        • $24698634

          I hope you live in Kentucky; you deserve Mitch.

      • http://www.facebook.com/corey.dennison Corey Dennison

        That’s quite a fantasy world you live in, sweet-cheeks.

      • http://www.vatican.va/ Rulz

        ….you do realize the democrats are on record saying they can’t beat Mitch….so…..

  • $46661540

    Who didn’t see this one coming? I don’t think she could as openly talk about rape as a candidate or, God forbid, a senator.

    • SpinMeNot

      My take on it is that her “announcement” was timed to help distract from Menendez. Her self destruction is just an added bonus to give us something to talk about/report on that prevents a large number of people from focusing on something actually important, like say the economy.

    • SpinMeNot

      My take on it is that her “announcement” was timed to help distract from Menendez. Her self destruction is just an added bonus to give us something to talk about/report on that prevents a large number of people from focusing on something actually important, like say the economy.

  • http://www.facebook.com/richard.jefferies.96 Richard Jefferies

    Somebody must have had a talk with her. “Mrs. Francetti-Judd, you suck at this. Go away before you gift the Republicans the seat.” ~ Democrat Party.

  • http://extremesplash.wordpress.com/ Ben Bollman

    Damn, she would have been a dream candidate for us – a living embodiment of everything that is wrong with the left

    • VictorErimita

      But unfortunately also an embodiment of what is wrong with a country in the thrall of celebrity culture, entertainment news and comedians as deep thinkers. Never underestimate the gullibility of the LIVs.

      • http://extremesplash.wordpress.com/ Ben Bollman

        Which is what would make her loss even more awesome, Kentucky isn’t that gullible.

    • Hiraghm

      is there anything that’s not wrong with the left?

      • SpinMeNot

        Well, I believe listing what is correct with them would be far less likely to cause hand cramps, but we’d probably still be trying a few weeks from now just to get the list started.

        • Garth Haycock

          True. Nothing has fewer letters than everything.

          • SpinMeNot

            brilliant; absolutely brilliant.

            *hat-tip*

          • SpinMeNot

            brilliant; absolutely brilliant.

            *hat-tip*

        • Garth Haycock

          True. Nothing has fewer letters than everything.

      • SpinMeNot

        Well, I believe listing what is correct with them would be far less likely to cause hand cramps, but we’d probably still be trying a few weeks from now just to get the list started.

    • Hiraghm

      is there anything that’s not wrong with the left?

    • Miss Clairee

      Damn, I hate she is not going to run because as a rape survivor myself, I was hoping she would compare grocery shopping to being raped, being stuck in traffic to being raped, losing cell phone service to being raped! Because as a rape survivor, there is nothing worse than having RAPE trivialized…..but I was SURE Ashley was NOT going to do that! Heh!

      • http://extremesplash.wordpress.com/ Ben Bollman

        I was just looking forward to some stereotypical air-headed Hollywood press conferences where she talks about the tragedies in Darfur and Tibet as if coal miners in Kentucky afraid of losing their jobs care.

  • Stone Bryson

    I’m actually glad she’s not running. Yes, she’s crazier than a shithouse rat and would have been a horrible Senator, but I learned a long time ago not to underestimate ‘popular’ people running for office.

    Low-information voters get starry eyes when “stars” run for office, and genuine thinkers tend to be left scratching their heads, asking themselves, “how did THAT happen?” when they win. I’m glad this fear of mine is not going to be tested with Judd… at least not in 2014.

    • Canadian in USA

      Good point – that would explain Al Franken.

      • Garth Haycock

        Well, that and 1000+ votes from felons were more than enough for that margin of victory that was less than 400.

        • http://www.vatican.va/ Rulz

          It makes me wonder what should have been, but what could be even more troubling are the 1 million plus votes that went to Franken in the first place.

      • Garth Haycock

        Well, that and 1000+ votes from felons were more than enough for that margin of victory that was less than 400.

      • Judy B

        A trunk full of ballots explains Al Franken.

    • kate_middleton

      You make a good point.

      But I think the good people of Kentucky are smarter than that. She would have raised money, but she wouldn’t have had a chance to win after showing so much disdain for things important to the bluegrass state.

      I mean, can you think of anyone more out of touch with Kentucky? Maybe Bloomberg.

    • DixieAngel_76

      Very true. Al Franken, anyone?

    • http://www.vatican.va/ Rulz

      Well, that’s interesting, but look, Romney carried KY by over 20 points, Mitch has a good chance to be Senate Majority Leader, and Judd lives in Tennessee, thinks people shouldn’t breed, compared at least one thing to rape, and winters in the UK.

      Not exactly a winner for a KY Senate seat.

  • Emily B

    Oh, shucks. That would’ve been fun.

  • Steve_J

    Not enough “eye kisses”.

  • Scott Carroll

    Damn, I was going to send her campaign a few bucks just to help make sure she won the primary.

    • http://www.facebook.com/brett.mcmicken Brett McMicken

      she don’t need your rape money!

  • Scott

    translation: I made a complete arse of myself and the only liberal backing me is the pervert Billy Bob Clinton

    • kate_middleton

      He wasn’t even backing her! Apparently he met with Grimes (the Sec of State) and her dad (former head of Kentucky Dems) within the last couple weeks and was encouraging her to run.

  • Steve_J

    Six tweets to say “I ain’t running”?

    • Canadian in USA

      …and not one mention of rape.

    • http://twitter.com/paulolim Paulo Loreto Lim

      A failed attempt at portraying “articulate.”

  • Im_Rick_James

    Good idea on her part – she would’ve been crucified…

  • http://www.facebook.com/brett.mcmicken Brett McMicken

    instead, she will stick with running her mouth

  • http://twitter.com/paulolim Paulo Loreto Lim

    Her poor ego was busted when she realized the public was not taking to the streets clamoring for her candidacy and shouting their praises upon hearing her talking about feeling sad about being one of the highest paid in Hollywood.

    Now, she’s hoping to get reassuring replies on Twitter and waiting for a script playing an underdog candidate for Senate for her next movie.

  • Brian Roastbeef

    I’d laugh at how this brief flirtation with politics was such an abysmal non-starter, but I expect doing so would somehow be like rape.

  • http://www.facebook.com/kenneth.r.riggs Kenneth Ray Riggs

    Not running for senate is like being raped.

  • Rusty Shackleford

    A Hollywood far-far left actress realizing she’d never win in Kentucky? Color me shocked.

    • jojofido

      ok so I wasn’t the only one that thought “What? in Kentucky?….no seriously?” when there was talk about her running.

      • Rusty Shackleford

        It was like Joe Manchin trying to pass an AWB in West by God Virginyee. Hell I’m a Democrat and I wouldn’t vote for her. I do own an Ar15 and voted for Gary Johnson so they might kick me out though.

        Love how she has to make an excuse. I think Fred Phelps would have a better chance at being Mayor of San Francisco.

      • Rusty Shackleford

        It was like Joe Manchin trying to pass an AWB in West by God Virginyee. Hell I’m a Democrat and I wouldn’t vote for her. I do own an Ar15 and voted for Gary Johnson so they might kick me out though.

        Love how she has to make an excuse. I think Fred Phelps would have a better chance at being Mayor of San Francisco.

    • Jay Stevens

      I thought she simply decided that she did not want to take the potential pay cut.

      • http://www.vatican.va/ Rulz

        He he……when you get into office and manipulate the markets for your own personal greed, “pay cut” is seen under a new light.

        Then again, not sure if Judd has the slimy smarts for that kind of lucrative operation.

  • MikeTX62

    Don’t you know everyone at the Mitch McConnell campaign is in mourning today since @AshleyJudd has announced she will not be running for the Senate. I was so looking forward to her attempts to explain and justify some of the stupid, looney, asinine, and downright loopy comments she’s made and positions she’s taking. It would certainly have been entertaining.

    • DixieAngel_76

      Except that the lamestream media would have probably given her a pass on all of it.

      • Rick Bowser

        Without a doubt.

    • DixieAngel_76

      Except that the lamestream media would have probably given her a pass on all of it.

  • bidentime

    Nobody likes her. Everybody hates her. I think she’ll eat a worm.

  • anilpetra

    Congratulations to “bone collector” Karl Rove and the rest of the gang at American Crossroads for a knockout punch!

  • anilpetra

    Congratulations to “bone collector” Karl Rove and the rest of the gang at American Crossroads for a knockout punch!

  • gekkobear

    Family? Well that makes sense.

    Kids take up a lot of time and… oh wait she said having your own kids when others starved was “selfish” and she doesn’t have any.

    Well I guess her husband… oh they divorced in January? Ok… I’m running out of ways to explain this. She’s single with no kids… what family?

    She’s in her 40’s; her sister & parents probably see her once or twice a year at most; like most people her age. I don’t see that eating up a large chunk of her time.

    Why not pretend you’re doing something useful if you’re going to make something up?

  • gekkobear

    Family? Well that makes sense.

    Kids take up a lot of time and… oh wait she said having your own kids when others starved was “selfish” and she doesn’t have any.

    Well I guess her husband… oh they divorced in January? Ok… I’m running out of ways to explain this. She’s single with no kids… what family?

    She’s in her 40’s; her sister & parents probably see her once or twice a year at most; like most people her age. I don’t see that eating up a large chunk of her time.

    Why not pretend you’re doing something useful if you’re going to make something up?

  • mean gene

    As a conservative Kentuckian, I am profoundly disappointed. Ashley would have wiped the Dems out as a majority party in the KY House and probably could have ushered in a conservative governor in 2015. There are still too many Dems that campaign as conservatives and govern as liberals in my state. She would have smoked them out.

  • mean gene

    As a conservative Kentuckian, I am profoundly disappointed. Ashley would have wiped the Dems out as a majority party in the KY House and probably could have ushered in a conservative governor in 2015. There are still too many Dems that campaign as conservatives and govern as liberals in my state. She would have smoked them out.

  • http://depravda.blogspot.com Paul Zink

    *Reading all the comments on this story has enlightened me about #Kentucky. But what do you expect from a state whose very name sounds like a corny joke from a Ma and Pa Kettle movie?

  • AaronHarrisinAlaska

    Better version “I’ve made such an ass of my self these past few weeks that the phrase ‘curb stomped’ would not even begin to describe what my opposition would have done to me. Not to mention how much I have trivialized the act of rape by using it to describe every thing from breakfast cereal to car horns. I am too much of a pussy to apologize to victims of this horrible act in my treating it as though it were a joke and am instead going to run away and pretend I still have a shred of dignity left.”

  • kim

    yes her fan base of 100 voters is devastated but hoping yet another non-resident celebrity might be attracted by the job

    • Rick Bowser

      Rumor has it, Jim Carrey might be interested.