Here at Twitchy, each and every post undergoes a rigorous 72-point inspection to ensure you get nothing but pure Twitter gold with every click. Any writer knows that the real work comes in editing and revision, as any peek at a first draft will prove. Twitter has provided the public a valuable resource tonight, then, as people share these previously unheard lines of #AwfulFirstDraftDialogue. It makes you appreciate the classics even more when you know what could have been.

https://twitter.com/alifeinwords/status/287365325366898688

That’s still better than “Batman and Robin.”

What are you waiting for? Click it!

  • radjahshelduck

    Metaphorically speaking, it was a hot girl responsible for the death of that large hairy mammal.

    • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

      LOL, had to think about that one!

  • Zane Henry

    Luke! I’m sure you’re going to find this plot twist as ham-fisted as I do, but I’m your dad. And that chick you kissed? Yup, she’s your sister. #AwfulFirstDraftDialogue

  • grais

    Favorite : We’re gonna need a smaller shark.
    lolol

    • orringtonmom (D)

      yes, mine too.

  • nc

    Houston, don’t freak out or anything, but something’s a little “off” up here. No, no, I did not break it!
    #AwfulFirstDraftDialogue

  • Jack Deth

    Gentlemen. You can’t fight here. This is the Bed Room!”

  • http://www.theconservativevoices.com/ dmacleo

    #AwfulFirstDraftDialogue if you like your health insurance you can keep it

  • SineWaveII

    “for a long long time back when I was a little kid I was thinking, maybe organized crime would be a good career path”

  • orringtonmom (D)

    “fasten your seatbelts. we don’t want anyone to get hurt.”

    “hey, is this iowa? yes, it’s iowa.”

    “i want the truth! ok, but i’m not sure you’re gonna like it.”

    “inconceivable! nice word. you should use it more.”

    “Luke… it’s me! Daddy!”

    • GaryTheBrave

      “I was having a really bad day. Thanks to everybody for these and for the photoshopping tweets and comments. Brilliant.”

      Okay, I’m stumped. What movie is that from?

      • orringtonmom (D)

        Twitchy: The Movie

        • mickeyco

          Wonderful, orringtonmom & Gary.

  • Catchance

    #AwfulFirstDraftDialogue: “Here I am glancing at you flirtatiously, young woman.”

  • BlueGood

    “Go ahead…..Make my bed…..

  • BlueGood

    “This is a .22 caliber Saturday Night Special, the most powerful handgun in Chicago”….

  • BlueGood

    “I know you’re thinkin’, Did he fire 3 shots or 2?, 4 shots or 7?, 5 shots or none?…well, I forget too, but the question is….Are you feelin fortunate small mentally challenged rabble rouser??…well Are you??…CLICK!

  • $30423294

    Frankly my dear, I’m not at all interested in what you just said to me.

  • $30423294

    Yes, Rocky, there is one thing I want you to do for me. I want you to triumph over your opponent, Apollo Creed, in your long awaited rematch, a few days from now.

  • $30423294

    Surely you’re joking.

    No I’m not, and don’t call me someone who seems to be joking.

  • coreopsis has set in

    “I can’t determine the identity of the man on First.”

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    Cool! Twitchy’s got a Fark-thread going! What’s next, Photoshop contests?

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    “Look guys, I know you’ve said I can’t see my friend Sarah right now, so let me go analyse the situation, come up with some alternate solution which will be acceptable to both of us, and I’ll be back as soon as possible.”

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    “Don’t just stand there, pull me back up, you fools!”

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    “To explore previously unexplored parts of space that we don’t know much about yet, but being careful about it so nobody gets hurt.”

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    “My name is James Bond. People call me James Bond.”

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    “It’s good to be the king, but not as good as you might think. Some days, the pressure, the responsibility, it just isn’t worth it.”

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    “YOUR MOTHER GIVES MANI-PEDIS IN HELL!”

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    “Who am I kidding? I was NEVER contender material . . . “

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    “Err . .. Mr Khan . .. ? When you have just a moment, Mr Khan, sir . . . .”

  • http://pennyrobinsonfanclub.net/ PennyRobinsonFanClub

    “Don’t get on that ship! That book! It’s . . . it’s a COOKBOOK! Of Low-fat, low-salt tofu recipes!! You’ll starve to death!”

  • mickeyco

    I was having a really bad day. Thanks to everybody for these & for the photoshopping tweets & comments. Brilliant.

  • GaryTheBrave

    Marty, my theory is that if you drive this Oldsmobile at the legal speed limit for exactly 60 seconds, you will be a minute into the future.

  • tsluf273

    “One shall maintain his footing. One shall lose his footing”

  • tsluf273

    “One shall maintain his footing. One shall lose his footing”