ABC News explains the science of twerking; What’s next for #ABCReports?

All you need to know about the Miley Cyrus/Robin Thicke “duet” at Sunday night’s Video Music Awards can be summed up in the horrified faces of Will Smith’s kids. (Correction: It was Lady Gaga’s performance that prompted that reaction.) Yesterday, the deep thinkers in the media went back and forth over whether the performance itself was racist or if calling the performance racist was racist. Now, two days later, ABC News is at work trying to explain the physiology at work in “twerking.”

No, really. “Twerking: A Scientific Explanation,” featured on the health section of ABC News’ website, claims that “only a Ph.D. researcher can explain how the body does what it does to make it happen.” Well? “You take a wide stance with your legs turned out at 10 and 2 so your hips are externally rotated. Then you pulse up and down as you thrust the pelvis bone forward and back.”

Fascinated follows latched on to the #ABCReports hashtag to predict the next scientific breakthrough from the ABC News team.

Editor’s note: This post has been updated with a correction.

  • Damien Johnson

    Carlos Stranger @Joe_Schmuck

    “I’ll Knock You Into Next Week” have black mothers invented time travel? Details at 11. #ABCReports

    ———–

    Jeppy Jefferson @JeppyKeith

    “Go get a switch” How black children have led to mass deforestation #ABCReports

    Ok, these just had me rolling. My future kids will know both of these and cower in terror if they act out LOL

    • LinTaylor

      “Keep Making That Face and It’ll Freeze That Way”: The sinister link between American mothers and the plastic surgery cartel.

      • Damien Johnson

        Perfect!

      • AMERICAN Kafir™(KAdams)

        “Don’t make me turn this car around!” Field testing of the newest NASCAR technological breakthroughs in turning left.

        • LinTaylor

          “No dessert until you clean up your plate!”: Collusion between parents and Midwestern farmers causes severe job loss in the ice cream industry

  • Guest

    I cannot believe that article at ABC was anything except satire. Then again, ABC is owned by Disney, so it could just be a way to keep their brand in the limited spotlight.

    • Bathing Suit Area

      Surely you can’t have missed that ABC were being tongue in cheek.

      • Thomas, Snarkmaster General

        With how moronic most media types can be these days (see Ed Schultz), how do you know they were being tongue-in-cheek.

        “Now, mustard gas isn’t made from mustard…” – CNN Science reporter during the second Iraq War

    • Bathing Suit Area

      Surely you can’t have missed that ABC were being tongue in cheek.

  • http://www.freedomreconnection.com CO2 Producer

    Throwing Shade: Have Urban Youths Discovered How to Make Practical Use of Gravitational Lenses? #ABCReports

  • Kristen Peterson

    have to admit these tweets are hilarious! looks like some LIVs are waking up to just how lame the LSM is.

  • therealguyfaux

    #ABCreports “If you’re over 25, twerking may not be for you.”

    Not just from a physical standpoint– from an intellectual-maturity and a leaving-behind-juvenile-attempts-at-sexuality standpoint.

    If you’re still needing to twerk at 25 to get a guy to think you MIGHT be sexy, you haven’t learned much, or you have other problems. Trust me.

  • Michael Hampton

    Um…Twitchy is considering it newsworthy that people made fun of ABC reports. And you would swear the Earth split open and satan himself walked out and twerked in front of the cameras from all of the tooth gnashing and hand wringing going on here.

    • trixiewoobeans

      Smugly Do-right strikes again!

    • thetreyman

      twitchy is about twitter trends. this trended so here we are.

    • J. Cox

      It’s pretty sad you think the entertainment /media section of a really not a news site is news.I know leftist have a hard time doing anything other than lying,but please try thinking before you type at least once a day.

      The second saddest part is that you can’t read,or have no comprehension skills ..can you please show us the “hand wringing” or “tooth gnashing”…all I see is a little snark at the expense of a failed news(note…they ARE supposed to carry real news unlike this site) organization.MMFA is doing a terrible job with you trolls lately.

    • J. Cox

      It’s pretty sad you think the entertainment /media section of a really not a news site is news.I know leftist have a hard time doing anything other than lying,but please try thinking before you type at least once a day.

      The second saddest part is that you can’t read,or have no comprehension skills ..can you please show us the “hand wringing” or “tooth gnashing”…all I see is a little snark at the expense of a failed news(note…they ARE supposed to carry real news unlike this site) organization.MMFA is doing a terrible job with you trolls lately.

    • AMERICAN Kafir™(KAdams)

      Whatever, dude.

    • Thomas, Snarkmaster General

      Maybe it’s because ABC’s “report” was on something absolutely STUPID.

    • nickshaw

      No, the “Earth split open and satan himself walked out and twerked in front of the cameras” the moment Miley attempted to twerk and the race baiters called it racism.
      Or something.

    • nickshaw

      No, the “Earth split open and satan himself walked out and twerked in front of the cameras” the moment Miley attempted to twerk and the race baiters called it racism.
      Or something.

  • LegalizeShemp

    ABC -“Anything But Conservative” or “All Buttmunching Commies”

  • TocksNedlog

    Rodeo clowns

  • el_polacko

    ‘twerking’ is nothing new. they’ve been doing the dance (called by other names) in the caribbean for decades.

    • Heather_A

      Pretty much.

      ~H

  • Bombus

    Pretend you’re a bitch in heat. Like that.