PSA: No, George Zimmerman did not win millions in the Florida Lottery

Scores of Twitter users were shocked to learn that the recently acquitted George Zimmerman won a $37 million Florida Lottery jackpot:

And thus, The Onion’s tally of gullible — and very angry — trolling victims climbs ever higher:


(Hat tip: @brkolo)

  • John Howard

    These folks are so dumb it’s actually sorta cute. It’s no wonder they all believe Zimmerman set out to kill a black kid. They clearly will believe ANYTHING no matter how absurd!

    • Steven A

      Cute, and then you realize most of them meet all the qualifications to vote, serve in the military, and purchase a firearm.
      Then you’re just a little creeped out on the inside.

      • John Howard

        Too true!

      • TugboatPhil

        More than a little creeped out.

      • John Howard

        Creeped out a LOT!

      • grais

        They can serve on juries, too.
        God help us.

        • LibLieExposer

          They sound like members of the first OJ jury.

        • Ken Alan Draper

          I’m sure they’d love to, but their too stupid to play neutral for the jury selection process.

      • VerminMcCann

        Yeah, we passed cute a long time ago.

      • Conservative4Ever

        The are what Rush calls “low information voters”

      • Calvin

        More than a little creeped out. This is how Obama got (re)elected.

      • robcrawford2

        The upside of them buying a firearm is most of them will attempt to suck the round out of the barrel to clear it.

      • GaryTheBrave

        I just threw up in my mouth a little. Thanks.

    • ObamaFail

      They all also fell for the “Obama is going to fix our country” lie too.

      • Texan357

        They could care less about the country. They just want to loot it while they help it to sink. OBAMA PHONE!

    • grais

      dumbest people on the face of the planet.

    • Caniac Steve Henderson

      agreed..just proves how human nature over all is so flawed & faulty ..

    • trixiewoobeans

      They have Democratic “keep ’em on the Welfare Plantation” and Liberal-run educational systems to thank for that.

    • Frustrated Teacher

      They believed in ‘Hope and Change’ did they?

  • Richard J Sunkle

    That would be awesome if he did. Maybe millions of Americans should buy him lottery tickets. LOL

    • TroyGates

      or just send him a dollar each, he’d get millions

  • BoscoBolt

    These are the same dopers who fell for the state-run media lie that Zimmerman is WHITE.

    • BronzeSavior

      Oh,I thought his dad was white ,he says he is a White Jew .his mother is Hispanic,thats not a race.

      • Stephen L. Hall

        And his maternal great-grandfather is black.

      • VerminMcCann

        She was also Latina, which is derived from latinoamericano and is a racial classification.

      • krjfla

        His mother is from Peru. His great grandfather was Peruvian/black. How disappointed all the protesters will be when they finally hear about his family heritage. : /

        • Jay Stevens

          No they will not be. All of this information has been known for months.

        • GaryTheBrave

          That means he wasn’t African-American, he’s South American American. Not one of THEM.

      • papagrune123

        You had better try to sell that to the US Government, The IRS, the Census Bureau. Try to convince LULAC and National Council of La Raza on this. They do out number the NAACP and NBPP.

    • Strangelove

      He was also Jewish at one point.

  • Bemani Dog

    The Onion is great for schmuck bait.

  • RblDiver

    Well, it might be valid, I mean, with the MSNBC case, and if they take one on CNN for releasing his personal info, he COULD win a lottery in that sense >.>

  • Janice LEE

    It’s the Martin’s who won the lottery. They were paid one million dollars from the homeowners association. They ought to be sued for the money back.

  • ceemack

    That might be just enough to pay his legal bills and the cost of all the security he’ll need over the next twenty years or so.

    • grais

      I was hoping it was true. And then I remembered that the Martin’s will probably sue him. I’d like to see him win it after the statute of limitations has passed.

  • E L Frederick

    Never underestimate the stupidity of people in large groups.

    • mike_in_kosovo

      Or Liberals in *any* grouping.

    • trixiewoobeans

      Nazi Germany being a good example.

    • aquamix

      yep, just like EVERYONE I’ve seen replying on this… ignorance is a disease, get well soon people

      • lysergia25

        thank you for saying that,….I SWEAR..LOL even if some get facts wrong,.. so what..LOL it’s NO BIGGIE! It’ll be ok..calm your nipples people..LOL

  • I hate you racists screaming f

    Wow… And Zimmerman is the racist? LOLOLOLOL

    • Canadian in USA

      Funny…I was just thinking that.

  • Richard J Sunkle

    Don’t tell anybody but I heard he won the Jeep in Rush Limbaugh’s Two if by Tea contest. ssshhhhh

    • Strangelove

      Evidently, it wasn’t me. “Since my phone still ain’t ringin’, I assume it still ain’t you.”

    • Ken Alan Draper

      get the twitter rumor started that Zimmerman was gunned down by a vigilante & these idiots will move on.

  • Oxbow

    Deez haterz mad jelly

  • TDS

    The stupid…
    It BURNS!!!

  • Joe W.

    The combined intellect of a Banana Slug.

  • BSBBuddy4Life

    I think its hilarious that anyone would believe this

  • Steve_J

    Like Rev Al said, ignant.

    • grais

      That always makes me laugh.
      “Don’t tell us dat we ignint!”

  • mike_in_kosovo

    #LowInfoLibs…by definition

  • $17227379

    I love how none of them link back to the original. They just want to be angry and spew racist BS.

  • A.J.

    How in the world is it possible for anyone on the internet to not know what The Onion is?

    • VerminMcCann

      When you’re dealing with people who are too stupid to learn to speak coherently, anything is possible.

    • LinTaylor

      How about the people who read the article about Harry Potter actually causing Satanism, and never caught on that if J.K. Rowling had actually said “Hail Satan”, more than a single newspaper would have covered it?

    • MNWoman

      I truly think most of the people who are “outraged” by this only know that Trayvon Martin was black and George Zimmerman is white, or the newly formed term “white-hispanic”. They don’t know the case for self defense, don’t know any of the evidence presented during the trial. And they still think this was racially motivated.

      • MeHi Mbdexp

        Even if they know, won`t care. Facts for them mean nothing

      • Raisheda Mitchell

        It was racially,motivated. Racism isnt just a black white thing. The facts are he racially profiled Trayvon Martin. Followed him and instigated the confrontation. Those are the facts and this flawed law allowed him to be free. So basically you can follow ppl around you consider suslicious confront them get into a physical confrontation and shoot them down in cold blood claiming self defense ..yay..Goooo America smdh. As if racism ended

        with blacks and whites only

        • bosslady

          These are people we see everyday. Get real black people and see what is in your face. These people on this blog are calling you stupid just like their ancestors did. It will never end! I wish the tables could change and they become the hated one!

          • Elena0412

            I’ve been called stupid by black people on this very blog. People who couldn’t SPELL stupid. And my IQ is…well higher than average (Mensa). Is that racist?

    • Deborah Hallsted

      Because they would have to read more than just a headline, and understand satire. And that’s just too much work.

      • Dr Anderson

        The easiest blame game is to play the racial card. Shame on Eric Holder for his comments. The ignorance to self defense is profound. Blaming ignorance on the female jury is profoundly shameful also. If you hate black crime start with Chicago. I hope the Hispanic community reaches out to stop the racial hatred toward them.

    • Ken Alan Draper

      I hope they stumble onto “the duffel blog” their tweets will be hilarious.

    • GaryTheBrave

      They think it means Union.

  • LinTaylor

    If we work quick, maybe we can sell these people some headlight fluid and canned snipe meat before they catch on.

    • GaryTheBrave

      DVD & CD rewinding machines. We can scare them into believing that rain has dihydrogen monoxide so they never step outside again.

      • Jeff Coil

        These are the type of people who would protest to ban that dangerous dihydrogen monoxide.

  • Kenpachi

    Well, he may not have hit the lottery, but his payday is coming in the form of his lawsuit against NBC. Hope he takes them for every penny they have.

  • ToyZebra

    I just heard George Zimmerman married a yeti and moved to Mt. Everest! How could he be allowed to escape to the tallest mountain in the world?!

  • StopThisMadness

    Now we know the speed of stupid.

  • conservative2012

    Lol The Onion sure knows how to bring out the gullible in people.

  • Timothy Kennedy

    This isn’t dumb…the Onion is ginning up the murder of GZ by putting this BS out. This is intentional. Don’t be fooled into thinking these b*stards are above outright murder to get their way.

  • Doug Williams

    Ha,ha…this is toooo funny.And to think the Rinos are afraid of these peeps.Sad..very sad.

    • ernst1776

      I’m afraid of them….. the youth, esp. the inner-city you, are as stupid as a person can be. And stupid people are dangerous people.

      • Doug Williams

        Courage is the first of the human qualities because it is the quality which guarantees all the others~Winston Churchill

      • Doug Williams

        Its the dope…

  • Stephanie Soucek

    after reading all those comments I just thought “oh God please help this nation full of uneducated hateful people.”

  • Conservative4Ever

    The Onion needs to start writing these stories in cursive!

    • Michelle

      I just choked on some water.

  • Justin Hogan

    He kinda did win the lottery with all the money he will get from the NBC and CNN lawsuits.

  • Strangelove

    Girl: “You can’t put anything on the internet that isn’t true.”
    Guy: “Where did you read that?”
    Both: “The internet.”

  • Jeff Coil

    This explains a lot.

  • JamestheFin

    Wow!!! Now I know who falls for all of those ‘Nigerian Bank’ money scams.

  • therain

    I love that the race-bating liberals were suckered in.

    • $22639970

      Suckering libtards is the easiest thing in the world. Even morons like Obama and Pelosi can fool these carbuncles.

  • Mike Rogers

    The lottery will come when he sues NBC.

    • Raisheda Mitchell

      he wont have a penny left if he does win because the Martin Family will sue him lol

  • Gibby Gibby

    yall cant accept the fact that by the being no evidence stating george zimmerman had killed trayvon martin and so what if he did win the lottery let it be everything should just be over ya it sucks trayvon lost his life but not every child is as innocent as they are made out to be im no perfect angel and neither are any of you so yall need to get off yall high horse and come back down to reality and smell the roses

  • Calvin

    Beyond stupid. Behold what America’s public education system has produced. smdh, indeed.

  • Semper Fi

    God help us all.

  • James Rose


  • BO_stinks

    they certainly prove, “they are trayvon” with every tweet

  • san rafael blue

    I’m just waiting for Eric Holder to go on TV lookin stern and angry about this latest injustice from the “white” devils. This us what happens when you only enjoy life as certain other people are suffering. Jealous Much?

  • Flax Seed

    Heard he got the ticket when he went to buy some Skittles

  • stlworker

    All these dumbasses on here he ain’t won shyt

  • B-rad

    Dumb as a bag of hair.

  • MeHi Mbdexp

    Anyone surprised? This are the low information voters.

  • Elena0412

    These are the people we are entrusting with our democracy. Any brain stem has an equal vote and uses it to vote himself the fruits of others’ labor. There used to be literacy tests before one was allowed to vote, but those were ruled raaaacisssst.

    • bosslady

      Go to hell in a Biiiig basket Elena… you people just need to admit to how you feel about black/colored people so it’s all put on the table. The sad thing is your someone we look at daily. A teacher, waitress, lawyer, doctor, nurse, maybe even a politician trying to get our vote. If the tables were turned would it be fair for us to treat your people in such a way?

      • Elena0412

        I didn’t mince words when I explained how I feel about stupid, entitled people. I don’t really care what they look like. We’d have a much better government if one had to prove even a low level of knowledge before being allowed to vote. You are fortunate Twitchy allows ad hominem attacks in comments.

  • Elena0412

    Our overfed, stoned-out electorate…

  • USPatriot

    After George sues NBC he will have the money of a lotto winner.

  • Don Truscott

    Lmfao dumb ass libs…….still lmao.

  • $22639970

    Absolutely NOTHING is dumber than a left winger…otherwise they wouldn’t be left wingers.

  • Ron Morisseau

    What’s the opposite of MENSA?

    • seek456


    • stuckinIL4now


    • RanierWest


  • Ty Mcwilliams

    It makes total sense that the same folks who think he got away with murder would also believe an Onion story.

  • © Sponge

    This is why Owebama will win a 3rd term.

  • bossmanham

    The onion, people….

  • Ken Alan Draper

    no, he didn’t win the lottery. but he will win the NBC/MSNBC/State prosecutor lottery after he wins his defamation of character/disclosure of personal financial information/civil rights abuse lawsuits.

  • yodaflame

    These people all sound as smart as the people who explained on video why they were voting for Obama.

  • Andy Trimble

    The Onion… isn’t that an arm of MSNBC?

  • Big Ed


  • Jamie Henry Nelson

    Wow, I never knew that the onion was racist. But I shouldn’t be surprised. I can’t believe the comments that I’m reading here. It really disgusts me to see that “they” are right. I really thought that we were moving away from this racism. Now I realize that most white people still see African Americans as somehow less than us. People are protesting peacefully because justice was not served. And I would march beside “them” before I march beside any of you for any reason. This makes me sick.

  • BeeKaaay

    Not only are leftwingwackos bloodthirsty, they’re also st00000pid. They bought the Onion story as true fact instead of the satire that it is 😉

  • IG: @GUWAP_iii

    Are you guys mad that us people( blacks) are able to qualified to vote & be on the jury just like you guys ? & we arent dumb we are outraged i agree some of these comments are ignorant but dont call us dumb because we express ourselves with vulgar words and negative actions , & you guys comments would totally change if it was a black man killing a little white skater boy riding through the neighbor hood knocking over trash cans and putting graffiti up

    • al hunt

      google roderick scott.

  • Gibby Gibby

    totally stupid as fuck people just want to hear what they want and not actually listen to what is actually going on