‘Wrapped up like a douche’: John Kerry mixes up ‘Sweet Adeline’ and ‘Sweet Caroline,’ sparks #JohnKerryLyrics

The New York Yankees played Fenway Park favorite “Sweet Caroline”  after the Boston Marathon bombing this week. Secretary of State  and former Massachusetts Sen. John Kerry remembered it a little differently while testifying before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee.

“Sweet Adeline”?

Video of Kerry’s gaffe at the Washington Free Beacon.


Of course, it’s not his only sports-related flub.

Plenty of Twitterers are imagining Kerry’s other embarrassing (and hilarious) mondegreen moments.

Keep ’em coming, Twitter!

  • Clayton Grant

    #JohnKerryLyrics – Desperado, you’ve been outright offensive

    • Miss Clairee

      #JohnKerryLyrics – Big ol’ Jed left the light on (“Jet Airliner” – Steve Miller Band)

      • Clayton Grant

        In a glob of Velveeta, honey (Iron Butterfly)

        • ChelieinTX

          Funny truth – the title was meant to be “In the Garden of Eden” but Doug Ingle was too stoned to sing it clearly.

        • John Thomas “Jack” Ward III

          In the Garden of Eden, baby… #TheSimpsons XD Jawamax #MusicTriviaTime

        • Miss Clairee

          Mmmmmm. I love globs of Velveeta! FLOTUS and her BMI police better not even think about outlawing that yummy, delicious, ooey-gooey cheesy perfection!

          • Mike Peterson

            Her husband will come for your guns and just when you thought things couldnt get worse she takes your Velveeta!(worst day ever)

    • Miss Clairee

      #JohnKerryLyrics – I’ll never leave your pizza burnin’ (“Beast of Burden” – The Rolling Stones)

      • Clayton Grant

        Like a virgin touched for the thirty-first time. (Madonna)

    • Miss Clairee

      #JohnKerryLyrics – Mama’s gonna take my cordless phone away. Mama’s gone take my cordless phone, Mama’s gone take my cordless phone, Mama’s gone take my cordless phone away! (“Kodachrome” – Paul Simon)

      • Clayton Grant

        Notice how country lyrics rarely get messed up?

        • Miss Clairee

          Yes but Jason Aldean’s “Take a Little Ride” says….”Slide your pretty little self on over….” For months I have been singing, “Slide your pretty little cell phone over…..” My 16 year old finally corrected me!

          • Clayton Grant

            When my 20 yr old son was in kindergarten, he sang along with Sting “RockkkkSlam … you don’t need to turn on a bed light” – I was happy with his interpretation.

            Then again, I used to think Sexual Healing said “Darling, you’re so great, I can’t wait for you to ovulate.”

          • Miss Clairee

            Hahahahaha! Hilarious!!!!!!

          • Clayton Grant

            Hilarious to you. Highly embarassing to me. 😉

          • Frank Drebin

            My boy was 6 or 7 when the movie Wayne’s World came out. He really liked the song, “Bo-heeming Rap City”

          • Clayton Grant

            Scare a moose, scare a moose
            Will you do the fun mango

  • marcellucci

    #JohnKerryLyrics – High on a hill was a lonely goat turd
    Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo…..

  • RightThinking1

    Lucy in the skies with diamonds

    • John Thomas “Jack” Ward III

      Lucy in Disguise, with Diamonds… #BugMusic #MusicTriviaTime Jawamax 8<{D}

  • RightThinking1

    Reverend Blue Jeans

  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeBeq0i03bg Booker

    It’s so easy to make fun of politicians when they try to become masterminds. Keep it up Twitchy! This is a great service!

  • malpaso

    This guy once said after watching a Red Sox game that his favorite player was “Manny Ortez.” No such person was on the roster. He scrambled Manny Ramirez with David Ortiz. Too much ketchup on the brain.

    • algonquinmatt

      yeah? well..he could beat your ass in a yacht race.


      • erehwon

        Not if he has to drive over to New Hampshire to get his before he can even start …

    • TheOriginalDonald

      Secretary Ketchup has NOTHING on Mumbles Menino!


  • J.N. Ashby

    But he would’ve been better than Bush, eh?

  • independentjones

    “Well, if a Cyst, turned out Benign, I don’t mind.” #JohnKerryLyrics

  • Fire and Adjust!

    #JohnKerryLyrics – I’m a Masshole leoooleoooleoooleoo

  • SineWaveII

    Hey Joe why you mowin’ with that sun on your land.

  • http://www.facebook.com/zee.carlson.7 Zee Carlson

    Riding in the bat plane

  • John Thomas “Jack” Ward III

    @BenHowe #PearlJam #MusicTriviaTime XD Jawamax 8<{D}
    #JohnKJerryLyrics Got a Black Jack, do it again… #SteelyDan #DonaldFagen

  • disqus_eric

    I’m just a ghoul… Oh, wait, that’s what Diane Feinstein would sing…

  • nc

    Hey I just met you, and you might be crazy. But here’s some money. So don’t bomb us, maybe?

    • Nan

      Isn’t that what Obama said to Morsi? Or the Palestinians? Or was it that Taliban? Wait, wasn’t it Pakistan? So hard to keep track.

  • froggy19510

    #JohnKerryLyrics-Jose can you see.
    Got the national anthem and immigration too.

    • RightThinking1

      Or…, My Country ‘Tis of Thee
      “Land where my fathers died, Land of the pills inside…”

  • Kevin MacDougall

    Count the headlice on the highwaaaay….

    • RightThinking1

      Nice. Kind of redefines ‘tiny dancers’, no?

      • trixiewoobeans

        Oh dear, oh dear!

    • Kevin Scott

      “Mental hooves not healing
      Ooh, a butt’s to blame!” ‘Crazy Train’
      (fellow KISS fan, by the way)

    • erehwon

      Surprised nobody’s mentioned, ‘Happy as a raptor in the marketplace’, and ‘Give pizza chants’.

  • therantinggeek

    Give me the Beach Boys, and free my soul, I wanna get lost in your Rocky Road and drift away… #JohnKerryLyrics

    • Ron Tanase

      still laughing!

  • CatHerder

    There’s a deer in my beer…#JohnKerryLyrics

  • Jack Deth

    #JohnKerryLyrics: Bomb. Bomb. Bomb. Bomb Bomb Iran!

  • John Barleycorn

    Now You’re Standing In The Neon, looking like a guy I want to pee on – Blake Shelton

    • Miss Clairee

      Oh my! You are so right about that one!

  • Dexter Alarius

    John, Lady Mondegreen wants to come to your next cotillion.

  • neoface

    Obama and his minions are all inept!!! I think that might one of the qualifications to be part of Obama’s administration, “ineptitude”. God help us all!!!!

    • http://profiles.yahoo.com/u/YJ5G3N25JBSWDNFKBTXEVLR4NU Walt

      A friend/mentor once told me that first rate managers hire first rate underlings so as to have the best team possible. Second rate managers hire third rate underlings so the wokers won’t make the manager look like an idiot. Turns out he was right.

  • capisce

    Oh, Maggie, I wish I could have seen your grave.

  • tommcgtx

    “I was for Sweet Adeline, before I was against her”

  • capoprimo

    A dufus is still a dufus, he can join hands with Biden!

  • tommcgtx

    #JohnKerryLyrics “Excuse me, while I kiss this guy” – Purple Haze

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Don-Nichols/100001773710743 Don Nichols

    My personal country favorite ” How can I miss you if you won’t leave”

  • Randy W

    What are nerds for?

  • ceemack

    Do you suppose he thinks the “purple mountains’ majesties” are above the fruited plane?

  • teamfrazzled

    And to the republic, for Richard Stands…

    • Michelle

      One nation under cod…

      • CrashFroelich


        • CrashFroelich

          with liverwurst and juice boxes for Al.

      • http://twitter.com/Throckmorton09 Biff Wellington


  • Michelle

    Enema! Enemaaa uh! (sung to the tune of Van Halen’s Panama)

  • VHG1

    “Kin ah git me a huntin’ license?”

  • gekkobear


    Take the Back Right Turn… I never understood that song as a kid.

  • gekkobear

    Or a somewhat more recent one…

    “The Cross-eyed Bear that you gave to me” – Alanis Morissette
    You Oughta Know…

  • Lotte Lenya

    “To be a rock and natural” – Stairway to Heaven

  • JustLikeAnimals

    Kerry also likes the local sports teams, including the Boston Ruins and the Boston Dress-Socks.

  • Jim

    Come on baby like my flower

  • kim

    my nephew used to croon, ” I would do anything for lunch”

  • kim

    Of course he also loved the Riccola commercial and would yell, “Thig ador!” through the house

  • http://www.facebook.com/lisa.dean.564 Lisa Dean

    #JohnKerryLyrics – And I ran, I ran so far away. I just ran, I ran all night and day. I couldn’t get away. (A Flock Of Seagulls) I didn’t even have to change any of the words and it represents him so well. :-)

  • Adela Wagner

    #JohnKerryLyrics-‘Rocket man… burning up his shoes with aerosol’. Elton John-Rocket Man

  • Adela Wagner

    #JohnKerryLyrics -“A Hairy Ass…A Hairy Ass” The Fifth Dimension-Aquarius

  • froggy19510

    C’mon tell the truth. When you see that football picture isn’t the first thing that pops into your head what a flit boy (I was being nice).

  • TheOriginalDonald

    John Kerry’s favorite sea mammal is Alex The Seal! #GoGos

  • Christopher

    Livin’ like a lover with a red iphone

  • TexSizzle

    You made the rice, I made the gravy, but it just may be some tuna fish you’re looking for. (Billy Joel, “You May Be Right”)

    Sweet cream is made of cheese. Who am I to disagree? I’ve traveled the world in designer jeans. (Eurythmics, “Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This”)

  • oneteedoffpatriot

    Americans are the funniest people on earth. “Unchained, and you hear the crowd runnin” VH

  • Timmmmm

    Can I get me a huntin license here?

  • Timmmmm

    During the 04 campaign he went to Geno or King of Steaks (not sure which) and asked for Swiss Cheese on his Sub. He is completely clueless.