Game changer: RIP Monopoly iron, hello kitty

Indeed it is. And no worries, the New York Times is on it!

It’s the BuzzFeeding of America.

Or perhaps, a War on Housewives:

Hasbro’s announcement that the Monopoly iron will be replaced with a cat might seem like minor news to you, but some are heartbroken. When will this assault on our childhood end?

Too late to Save Your Token now, guys. But hey, for better or worse, the thimble is still around.

Coming soon?

But don’t toss those irons just yet.

  • lissa

    What if I still play with my Iron token? Will some Big Daddy commission come after me?

    • TocksNedlog

      Nah. Playing with tokens is all good. In fact, currently I believe it is trending.

  • Bob Smooper

    If you visit the Deep South of America. I mean, REALLY deep. In the towns that are so BACKWARDS and out of touch they are still holding out hope that betamax will catch on. You will find a special edition of Monopoly in which the traditional pieces are replaced.

    Some of the pieces in Deep South Monopoly include:

    Silver Chewed Tobacco
    4.8 Litre SUV that gets 10 miles to the gallon
    Confederate Flag
    Jesus Riding on a Dinosaur
    KKK Figurine
    A book titled “God hates Scientists”

    • GTJessop

      Gee, doesn’t sound anywhere near as fun as the Urban Blight Ghetto Monopoly Edition, featuring:

      A hypodermic needle
      40oz Malt Liqour tall boy
      Crack Pipe
      Food Stamp
      ACORN voter registration form
      Watermelon wedge

      • journogal

        Forgot the stolen “heat.”

      • GaryTheBrave

        In the Urban version you not only go to jail and collect $200, you also collect EBT cards and receive a ballot for voting.

        Instead of Park Place it’s called Section 8. The railroads are renamed for transit routes. The “money” becomes lottery tickets.

        You win when you land on the Powerball square (which isn’t printed on the board).

      • Bob Smooper

        hah! they were good. made me laugh

    • journogal

      Smart one, the KKK was established by the Democrats. Grow up and think for yourself for once.

    • Karl H

      1) 4.8 liter? really? try 7.3 liter. Do they sell trucks for men where you live?

      2) Shotgun, Rifle, class 3 weapons. liberty and freedom still have meaning in the south.

      3) It is called a rebel yell, and it symbolizes southern economic independence, forget revisionist history, wars are fought for economics or religion and that has always been the case. Even the war of northern aggression.

      4) Jesus riding a dinosaur? I think your amyl nitrate induced flashback is a bit fuzzy, you probably remember that hufpo party where Barney Frank was riding Chris Matthews while pretending to be Obama.

      5) KKK figurine? no Clinton and Ted Kennedy bought those up at the estate sale of LBJ. You know the Democrat who reluctantly signed the civil rights act passed by Republicans.

      God does not hate scientists, but some of them make him laugh a lot. But it is ok ignorant damn yankees make southerners laugh too.

      • louisiana_mom

        Bless his little heart… but he tries.

      • EffeminateIvyLeagueFob

        “Do they sell trucks for men where you live?”

        Where he lives,they don’t even call them men anymore. They’re “myn”,which is Yankee moronspeak for “incomplete wymyn”,which is feminist newspeak for “I don’t understand science or the English language”. He hopes to one day have a penis as large as his mother’s.

        “It is called a rebel yell, and it symbolizes southern economic independence”

        It also symbolizes a hilarious good time when whipping the ol’ Stars and Bars out in front of a Starbucks-weaned New York liberal. Love that hyperventilation.

        “God does not hate scientists, but some of them make him laugh a lot. ”

        Speaking of hating science, why is it that a guy who spends his food stamps on liquor and watches NASCAR can understand that a 100 pound woman who is 80% body fat isn’t as fit for combat as a 200 pound man who is 80% muscle and a Harvard educated Yankee from “The only civilized place in the United States” can’t?

        Yankee libs love science. They collect a lot of facts and then ignore all those that don’t help their agenda.

        • SJ’s Dad

          (pwned ya coop!)

    • TomJB

      “If you visit the Deep South of America.”

      Spoken like someone who obviously has never visited the “deep south”.

      • TocksNedlog

        The only time Tea-and-crumpets Cooper leaves the Commomwealth is for a quick jaunt through the Chunnel to pick up some fromage to go with his lament.

        • Bob Smooper

          Hah! Hey don’t knock Crumpets, they are lovely with some butter on.

          • EffeminateIvyLeagueFob

            It’s a good thing yankees have no self-respect,because anybody with an ounce of manhood wouldn’t eat food that makes you feel like a homo for ordering it.

            “I’ll have the lobster bisque and a watercress salad,please.”

    • Noah Lee

      have you been to, what you would call “REALLY deep South”? Doubt you have. You just rely on stereotypes of regions of America that you get from telly.

  • peteee363

    i am thinking of hiring some chinese child labor, and make black market iron’s for monopoly. hey wait, is calling the black market black a racist comment?

    • Karl H

      only if a liberal deems it to be. the term blackhole was deemed racist by a liberal county comish in Dallas.

      Unfortunately peteee363 yes people are really this stupid.

      • Ken Alan Draper

        All cosmologists in the county are now required to refer to collapsed star singularities as “African-American Holes”

        • Ken Alan Draper

          and to refer to unknown matter in the universe as “African-American matter”.

      • peteee363

        i also remember when the old pc’s had master and slave drives. that was funny when they called that racist.

    • Bob Smooper

      yes, you are RACIST or as we like to say REPUBLICAN.

      • SJ’s Dad

        . . . sez the azzhat who phonetically spells out his RRRAAAAAACIST carachaturesque rant/impersonation of Herman Cain!!!!!!!
        (Glass Houses . . . Rocks . . . Ring any bells?!?!?!?!?!)

      • Noah Lee

        youre an idiot, or as we like to say…welcome to the board, Mr. Obama!

  • Gloves Donahue, Jr.

    Keep this news from Chicago Monopoly fans unless you want rioting, looting and cars overturned.

  • Kevin Krom

    Great. Now I’m allergic to a board game.

  • Tangchung

    kids now a days think the thimble is R2D2

  • TocksNedlog

    And the pussification of America continues . . .

  • Brian Roastbeef

    Finally, representation! We cats have had to look at that damned Scotty on there for years, powerless to do nothing about it except to bat the dog under the refrigerator. Now, Monopoly is ours!

    Wait… Monopoly? Humans still play that? Is it on PS3 or something?

  • fishydude

    The Iron? Better to replace the Car with an F150 Crewcab. That is the new family car since government regulation killed the station wagon.

  • GoSellCrazySomeplaceElse

    The iron had a monopoly, so govt. broke it up.

  • Kate

    Well, at least it’s not a Prius or a Volt. The iPhone version of Monopoly has a Prius as an option.

  • brewerandpatriot

    When will the wheelbarrow, which clearly represents my “out of status citizen” gardener, be taken out of the game?

    • 3seven77

      The wheelbarrow stays. When the Fed crashes you’ll need to fill it with dollar bills just to buy bread and milk.

  • Maxx

    So, it’s the cat with the candlestick in the library. That makes sense…. conniving little bastards. Oh wait, wrong game.

    The family dog.

  • stefan wilson

    a cat??? since when did monopoly become an animal loving boardgame??? let’s bring back the good ole iron!