Face, meet keyboard: Reuters afraid missile defense might shoot down Santa

In one of our favorite tone-deaf politicizations of Christmas, Reuters is suddenly worried about whether Santa will be safe from our planned East Coast missile defense system.

With all due respect, we’re pretty sure that our nation’s military knows that difference between a sleigh and an ICBM. Heck, NORAD tracks Santa every year. They know exactly when he’s going to fly, know what he looks like on radar, and have probably tracked him more than any other known object.

On top of that, you KNOW that sleigh is equipped with countermeasures. If it weren’t, Santa would have been downed by RPG fire over Kandahar a long time ago. If he needs an upgrade, we’re sure that Hanukkah Harry can hook him up with some sweet Israeli interceptor technology. So, rest assured kids, Santa is safe.

  • http://www.facebook.com/benjamin.wilhelm.528 Benjamin Wilhelm

    I ALMOST can’t believe it……clearly they are kidding, but, seriously……..?

  • Bob Smooper

    I am not worried about this. What DOES worry me is when Santa flies over Israel, the occupied land, he will be taken out by those surface-to-air missiles Israel likes to use!

    Hell, he isn’t safe on the ground either! He will probably be bombed!

    • TheOriginalDonald

      I’m sure he’ll have Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider as elves.

    • https://twitter.com/deseeded tombee

      Merry Christmas, dink.

  • dennylee60

    I think Santa should be worry more about Occupy redistributing all the goodies than being shot down.

  • radjahshelduck

    Well if Acme Earthquake Pills don’t work on roadrunners, perhaps NORAD missile defense doesn’t work on reindeer.

  • peteee363

    is the eu going to bill santa carbon taxes for his flights over europe? and will tsa molest santa and his reindeer at every opportunity they get? will moochelle make santa go on a diet? and will the obama administration force santa to not only unionize his elves, but also make santa pay for health insurance for them?

  • MrMeaner

    What reason could anyone have for being opposed to a proposed missile defense system on our own coast?…I can understand why leftists resist setting up systems in foreign countries, but why would you not want to defend your own country against an incoming missile attack?…Sometimes I think these clowns really are just America-hating Communist apparatchiks, who would love to see this country under attack

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Stephanie-Warren/100001648091118 Stephanie Warren

    Well it shot down Jack Skellington.