Snarkers hit gold with Mayan apocalypse

Well folks, the end of the 13th Mayan b’ak’tun is nearly upon us. Actually, for most of the world, it’s already here. So, in celebration of the fact that we’re still here — or possibly in preparation for our final collision with the dark planet Nibiru — here are some of the day’s best apocalyptic tweets.

For the second time in 24 hours we’re actually forced to give Roseanne props. Best cynical tweet of the day.

Do you insure against Nibiru damage? Zombies? We could definitely use zombie insurance. Does our current policy cover a magnetic pole shift or does that work like flood insurance?

Be sure to check back with Twitchy tomorrow for the very best in post-apocalyptic tweets.

  • 2ifbyT

    Well, their prophesies were wrong, but you can’t blame their drug dealer. He sold them really good stuff.

  • http://evilbloggerlady.blogspot.com/ Evi L. Bloggerlady

    Piers Morgan speaking is a sign of the end of any intellect on TV. Have an Oreo.

  • http://evilbloggerlady.blogspot.com/ Evi L. Bloggerlady

    I am having oysters to celebrate the end of today. I am pretty sure there will be a tomorrow.

    • disqus_eric

      Not if you’re allergic to oysters.

  • http://pinterest.com/j0s1395/ Josephine (D)

    The Maya were wrong. We’re not going to collide with Nibiru…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZMwKPmsbWE

  • Jack Deth

    Why are the Mayans held in such reverence when they were always busy eating peyote, drinking pulque and sacrificing virgins?

    I mean, it sounds like a party, but when exactly did they have time to apply the math and make predictions?

    And wouldn’t those predictions be considered errant due to their strange, somewhat backward behavior?

  • GaryTheBrave

    Tweet of the day to Mr. Farty who did the Hithhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy reference. Also, the Mayan calendar ends on the 21st which means the 21st is the LAST DAY. We all die on the 22nd.

    If the world were to end tomorrow what would you NOT do?

    • MoxieLouise

      worry about calories

    • therantinggeek

      Worry about what I’m going to wear.

  • Agent_Zeero

    Don’t we have to wait until midnight Yucatan time.

    • JoeMusgo

      I believe technically it’s referred to as Yucatime.

  • Steve_J

    Has anyone gotten through to Europe? Or, just getting the “All circuits are busy” recording?

    • MoxieLouise

      Nah, they just haven’t paid their phone bill.

  • Jarhead83

    D’OH!!!! Guess I shouldn’t have skipped paying all those bills…that’s gonna bite me in the ass.

  • http://www.twitter.com/TPBGirl TPBGirl ™

    I cant believe I shaved my legs for this… ANNND I have to go pay the cable bill now. crappy crap crap. I hate the Mayans! End of the world my ass!

  • stuckinIL4now

    I’ve been waiting since last night for even a hint that the ending has begun. People assume that a cataclysmic event will end it all, but what if the end comes with a whimper and all of us simply cease to be?

  • stuckinIL4now

    I’ve been waiting since last night for even a hint that the ending has begun. People assume that a cataclysmic event will end it all, but what if the end comes with a whimper and all of us simply cease to be?

  • JoeMusgo

    On the bright side, if the Mayans are right our taxes won’t go up after all! Who needs an effective minority opposition?