Dear Mom, I need $18K for birth control. Why *no,* I haven't "gone back on the coke." Why would you think that?!
—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012As Twitchy reported yesterday, the Trojan Man of the People is pushing a “Women for Obama” e-card from a poor, victimized Julia pleading with mommy to foot her $18,000 birth control bill.
If you're paying $18,000 for birth control, #youredoingitwrong. yfrog.com/o0j5fczj—
Lachlan Markay (@lachlan) September 28, 2012
She’s planning for the horror of a Romney presidency, natch. Evidently it will be just like the dark, dark days — prior to 2012 — when women had to shell out for their own diamond-studded diaphragms. (Ouch.)
Conservatives couldn’t resist giving it to Team Obama good. Real good.
Barack Obama wants you to ask your mom for an $18,000 birth control loan. Here's what she'd write back. momineedbirthcontrol.tumblr.com—
(@AlexaShrugged) September 28, 2012
An awesome new Tumblr imagines how mom would respond to the postcard from her precious child’s vagina.
“I’M SORRY, ARE YOU BUYING A CAR TO BRING IT ALL HOME IN, TOO?” Barack Obama wants you to ask y… bit.ly/TRiGBJ via @instapundit—
Instapundit.com (@instapundit) September 29, 2012
More from momineedbirthcontrol.tumblr.com:
I’m sorry, are you buying a car to bring it all home in, too? It’s called CVS – check it out.
Hey, if mom isn’t willing to shell out for a platinum IUD, Larry is totally willing to help out.
I think this was sent to the wrong address, but I’d be happy to chip — if you get my drift
–Larry
Er, bow chicka?
Seriously who did the math on this E-Card? $18,000 seems a little excessive; It's like we want them to make fun of us: momineedbirthcontrol.tumblr.com—
Dems Livestream (@DemsLivestream) September 28, 2012
It really is like they want to be mocked mercilessly. Time for blogger Ace of Spades to get in on the hot conservative-on-e-card action.
Dear Mom, I need $18,000 for birth control for my girlfriend. I'm dating Ringworld.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Ma and Pop, I need $18,000 for birth control for a girl. Her name is Sarah Connor. She lives in the past.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Mom, I need to borrow $18K for condoms. You know why. You survived dad.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Mom, can I borrow $18K? I have my eye on some sweet birth control pills and/or a 2011 Lexus.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Dear Mom, I need $18K for birth control. The "birth control" I have in mind is a "hitter" named Johnny Fingers. He's a pro.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Mom, can I have the $18K for birth control you paid $36K in taxes to provide? I like to pretend government money came from the sky.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Dear Mom, since you have a job, and I, being an Obama Voter, do not, you're kind of paying for my birth control either way, right?—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Dear Mom, I need $18K for birth control. I'm dating Jacksonville. Yes, the city.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Dear Mom, I need $18K for birth control and/or to find the crypt of the legendary Count Chocula.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Dear Mom, I need $18K for birth control and its convenient carrying case, a 2012 SeaDoo.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Mom, I need $18K for birth control. Who am I dating…? This is sorta embarrassing, given my politics, but it's Rafala. The Romneys' horse.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Mom, I need $18K to cover the costs of birth control, and by birth control, I mean one year tuition at Vassar.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Mom, I need $18K for a sick Dungeons & Dragons basement and 3,000 miniature figures and terrain. Birth control? Let's say it's a two-fer.—
Foreign Policy Pres. (@AceofSpadesHQ) September 28, 2012
Finally. Flukenomics explained for us simpletons! Ace truly is a national treasure.