Hammer time: Press swoons over Hillary Clinton, party animal

Hillary Clinton became the Secretary of Wild and Crazy at the swearing-in ceremony for Michael Hammer, her Assistant Secretary of Public Affairs. She gave new meaning to the phrase “it’s hammer time!”

Fetch your drool buckets; this caused some major Squee-ing.

More from the Huffington Post:

Hillary Clinton, can you please stop getting cooler and cooler? You’re making the rest of us look bad …

… Clinton then put on purple beads, tossed her hair (as she’s wont to do), and slipped on some cocktail rings.

But Sec. Clinton wasn’t done, adding, “Then, of course, the piece de resistance…” She then pulled out a pair of wild green and purple cat-eye sunglasses and proceeded to walk Hammer through his oaths in full Mardi Gras garb.

Wild shades, popping her collar and drinking wine in a castle? Confidential to Hillary: even though you give us an inferiority complex, please stay awesome.

You can hear the Squee as you read that, can’t you?

ABC lays it on thick as well.

They open with talk of her “spicing things up” (not a good visual) and then swoon at her hipness.

Clinton took off the glasses during part of her very personal speech reflecting on Hammer and his record of public service at both the White House and the State Department. But when it came time to administer the actual oath, she put the glasses back on, looked at the crowd and gave a resounding “O.K.!” before turning to swear in the new assistant secretary of state .. . with Madam Secretary looking tres cool in her wing-tipped shades.

Some Twitter users follow the press’s lead.

So cool! And hip and stuff! Evidently, the most important trait for a Secretary of State or a potential leader of the free world is the ability to pull off cat-eye sunglasses and purple Mardi Gras beads with panache. To be fair, we suppose it is a bigger accomplishment than any our current president has achieved.

Not purple pantsuits, though.

Hey, not everyone can pull off purple, right?

Um. I think we know that about the former president. Also, “less stuffy” is a strange way of putting it. Stuffy old rubes who choose not to be serial cheaters and harassers!

Secretary “Party Down” Clinton then took the stage at the Rio Summit this morning.

In sassy sunglasses and playful pantsuits!

And a sparkly scrunchie!

This Twitter user decides to give everyone nightmares.

Oh, no. For this he must pay!

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