Chuck Norris died this morning. But he is fine now.
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Funny Tweets (@autocorrects) March 10, 2012Here’s to one big happy birthday to the king of, well, everything.
@BadassoftheWeek – Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people…then it exploded!—
Dan Hammond (@Supersetdan) March 10, 2012
Fact: Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.—
Kelly Bossi (@KellyBossi) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris got hungry and walked into Burger King. When he walked out, the place was just Burger, and he was the King.—
Bonaparte David (@IamDaeveed) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris says: When I have a birthday, the candles blow me—
Kimberly M (@momgosomething) March 10, 2012
@justinbieber Chuck Norris doesnt need a twitter cause he is always following you—
tyler gavigan (@tygavigan20) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris would be 72 today if he hadn't defeated aging when he was 39.—
jimmy cochran (@jimmytcochran) March 10, 2012
The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's right foot.—
Julissa Thomson (@iAmJulissaThoms) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.—
Ms. Get.it.Crackin (@KayLove_AllDay) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris CAN have his cake and eat it too. #BirthdayTweet—
Nick Russell (@NWordRussell) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris can do a wheelee with a unicycle. #ChuckNorris—
Cody (@Cody2488) March 10, 2012
#ChuckNorris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise—
this bitch (@BitchzDelusionl) March 10, 2012
It's a big deal to go down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagara Falls in a cardboard box. #CNF—
Derek Daniel (@Derek_Daniel) March 10, 2012
When the conquistadors arrived in S. America they found a statute of Chuck Norris.—
Joey Cochran (@joeycochran) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet, he scares the sh*t out of it—
Steph G (@x_oxSteph) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice out of a lemon—
nina B (@ninaB4ever) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a royal flush.—
Mason Wolf (@MasonWolf13) March 10, 2012
"guys..you can't name a bridge chuck norris…because nobody crosses chuck norris." -Seth Meyers #SNL—
Grace Kumar (@gracie_kumar) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass…………at night.—
Cody (@Cody2488) March 10, 2012
Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone—
Jerry Silfwer (@DoktorSpinn) March 10, 2012
@autocorrects Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.—
Natasha Haji-ahmad (@crystals37) March 10, 2012